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神總結拖延症的一天你中槍了嗎(雙語)

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你是拖延症患者嗎?你知道拖延症的一天是怎樣的嗎?下面快來看看拖延症的一天是怎樣的,看看你有沒有中槍。

神總結拖延症的一天你中槍了嗎(雙語)

1. Make a show of describing your “terrible” journey to work.

作秀般地講述可怕的上班之路。

2. Go to the canteen to buy toast to recover.

去餐廳買點烤麪包填飽肚子。

3. Make a cup of tea.

泡一杯茶。

4. Have a quick look at the news on the internet while you eat your toast.

吃烤麪包的同時,快速瀏覽下網頁新聞。

5. Check Facebook.

刷刷臉書。

6. Check Twitter.

看看推特。

7. Check Instagram.

玩玩圖片分享。

k Facebook again.

再刷刷臉書。

9. Click on an enticing link about a celebrity.

點開一則有關明星的新聞鏈接。

10. Have a look at your emails. 382!

看一眼郵箱,發現竟然有382封郵件!

11. Decide you need to “get on top of your inbox” before you get stuck into work.

埋頭工作前,決定看看第一封郵件。

12. Think you could probably do with another cup of tea before you crack on.

開始辛苦的工作前,覺得可能要再來杯茶。

13. Offer your whole department a cup of tea.

給整個部門的同事沏茶。

14. What, no milk left? Sure, you don’t mind nipPing out for some!

什麼,沒有牛奶了?溜出去買點牛奶!

agram a funny pub chalkboard you see on the way to the shop.

買牛奶的路上看到一塊滑稽的酒吧黑板,分享到圖片分享軟件上。

16. Swing by accounts on your way back up to ask about an invoice.

離開時向售貨員要張發票。

them your funny picture.

讓他們看看那張滑稽圖片。

18. Make tea for your department.

給整個部門的同事沏茶。

19. Announce that you are “snowed” and can’t do anything until you’ve sorted these emails

抱怨自己被郵件壓垮,整理好郵件之前什麼也做不了。

20. Mark the important-looking ones as unread and come back to them later.

將看似重要的郵件標記爲未讀,稍後再返回查看這些郵件。

21. Why not make a load of folders and categorise them before reading too?

看郵件之前,爲什麼不建幾個文件夾將郵件分類呢?

22. Tweet about what a nerd you are for making your “geeky email folders”.

發個推特,說說自己整理這些討厭的郵件文件夾是多麼腦殘。

23. Make another cup of tea.

再沏杯茶。

24. Check your Twitter notifications to see if anyone’s favourited your email geek joke.

打開推特動態提醒,看看是否有人讚了你那條整理郵件文件夾的奇葩推文。

25. Have a look at Facebook and see a notification that it’s a friend’s birthday.

打開臉書,看到一條朋友生日提醒。

26. Google image search ‘happy birthday lol’ to find something good to post on their wall.

搜索“生日快樂”之類的圖片,選幾張發到朋友的照片牆。

27. Click on a quiz link your mate’s posted.

點擊進入朋友轉發的一個測試連接。

your Facebook how psyched you are that an Otter is your spirit animal.

發條臉書狀態,說說自己喜歡水獺是多麼瘋狂。

29. Look at Twitter notifications for RTs and favourites on your nerd joke again.

再刷新幾次推特動態提醒,看看有沒有好友請求,或者是否有人讚了那條奇葩推文。

emails since you’ve last checked – organise them in your new folders.

剛剛又收到了新的郵件——把新郵件放進新的文件夾。

31. Have a look at the intranet to see what’s on the canteen menu today.

瀏覽下公司內網,看看餐廳今天的菜單。

32. Tweet Burgers for lunch!

發條推文:“午飯吃漢堡!”

33. Read “urgent” email from your marketing nemesis about a brief you’ve apparently missed.

營銷部的“掃把星”給你封緊急郵件,裏面說明了你尚未完成的任務。

34. Go and talk to your marketing nemesis who has obv not made what they want clear if you’ve not done it.

雖然他們並未說清自己到底需要什麼,但你還是跑過去告訴他們自己是否已經完成任務。

35. Insist to them that you’ve never seen said brief before.

堅稱自己之前根本沒有看到過這個任務。

36. Call all brief “stakeholders” to a meeting to go over it again.

召集所有的“相關人員”開會,再次仔細討論該任務。

37. Go to the canteen for meeting snacks.

去餐廳拿點零食,開會時吃。

38. Go to the bathroom while you’re up.

會前去趟洗手間。

39. Make tea for the meeting.

沏杯茶,開會時喝。

off at your friend in design’s desk afterwards to bitch about marketing nemesis.

正好經過朋友的辦公桌,像朋友講幾句營銷部掃把星的壞話。

41. Check Facebook.

刷刷臉書。

42. Check Twitter.

看看推特。

k Instagram.

玩玩圖片分享。

k Facebook again.

再刷刷臉書。

ow up meeting with an email to project “stakeholders” about the process of the brief.

給“相關人員”發送郵件,實時播報任務進展。

46. Colour code it.

給郵件標色。

47. Categorise your new emails into folders so that you can get stuck into working through them after lunch.

把新郵件放入文件夾,這樣午飯後就可以埋頭工作了。

48. Go for lunch.

吃午飯。

49. It’s been a mad morning, Take an hour.

真是個瘋狂的早晨,一小時過去了。

50. Pick up post for your department from the post room on your way back.

回來時,從傳達室挑選出你所在部門的快遞。