兩個人的英語笑話閱讀
英語是一種語言工具，學習英語的最終目標就是能利用這種工具與別人自由流暢的交流。小編精心收集了兩個人的英語笑話，供大家欣賞學習!
Sam and a priest are driving one day and by a freak accident，have a head-on collision with tremendous force. Both cars are totally demolished，but amazingly，neither Sam nor the cleric has a scratch on.
一天，山姆和一個神父都在開車，發生了一起反常的事故，他們倆的車頭對頭猛撞到一起。兩輛車全毀了，但是意外的是倆個人都毫髮未傷。
After the crawl out of their cars，Sam sees the priest’s collar and says，"So you’re a priest. I am Sam. Just look at our cars. There is nothing left, yet we are here unhurt. This must be a sign from God!”
他們從各自的車裡爬出來後，山姆看到神父的領子說:“原來你是神父，我叫山姆。看看我們的車，全完了。然而我們還在這裡，沒有受傷。這一定是上帝的旨意!”
Sam is looking at his car and exclaims, "And look at this! Here’s another miracle! My car is completely demolished, but this bottle of wine did not break. Surely，God wants us to drink this wine and to celebrate our good fortune.”
山姆看著他的車說:“快來看看這兒，還有一個奇蹟!我的車全毀了，但這瓶酒還沒有碎。上帝肯定是想讓我們喝掉它來慶祝我們的好運。
The priest nods in agreement. Sam hands the bottle to the priest，who drinks half of the bottle and hands the bottle back to Sam. Sam takes the bottle and immediate1y puts the cap on，then hands it back to the priest. The priest，baffled, asks，"Aren’t you having any，Sam?” Sam replies, "Nah...I think I'll wait for the police.”
神父點頭同意了。山姆把酒交給神父，神父喝了一半然後又把酒還給山姆。他接過酒瓶迅速把瓶蓋蓋上，又把它給了神父。神父不解地問:“難道你不喝嗎?山姆?”山姆回答:“嗯，我想我還是等著警察來吧。”
兩個人的英語笑話篇2The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD)，the FBI，and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.
洛杉磯警察局、聯邦調查局和中央情報局都在盡力證明他們在抓捕罪犯方面是最好的。總統決定考驗他們一次。他往森林裡放了一隻兔子，每一方都得抓住它。
The C1A goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigation they conclude that rabbits do not exist.
中央情報局進了森林。他們在森林裡佈滿了動物密探，他們質問所有的植物和礦石目擊者。進行了三個月的廣泛調查之後，他們宣佈兔子根本不存在。
The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest，killing everything in it，including the rabbit, and they make no apologies.
聯邦調查局進人了森林。兩個星期後仍然沒有進展，最後他們燒了森林，殺死了裡面所有的一切，包括那隻兔子，並且他們沒有為此而道歉。
The LAPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling, "Okay! Okay! I am a rabbit! I am a rabbit!”
洛杉磯警察局進人了森林。兩個小時後他們帶著一隻被打得遍體鱗傷的黑熊走出來。這隻熊喊著:“好吧，好吧!我是隻兔子!我是隻兔子!”
兩個人的英語笑話篇3A deaf couple checks into a motel very late at night. Upon moving into their assigned room, they go to bed. But in the middle of the night, the woman has a headache，so she goes into the bathroom for aspirin. But she finds none，and remembers that the bottle of aspirin is still in the car. Afraid to go out alone at night, she awakens her husband and asks him to go and get the aspirin from the car. The very groggy husband puts on his robe and toddles wearily outside. He finds the bottle of aspirin in the car's glove compartment, and gets ready to go back to the room when he realizes something: he can’t remember which room was his
一對耳聾的夫婦在深夜住進了一間汽車旅館。一進了定好的房間他們就躺下睡了。但等到半夜，妻子覺得頭疼，於是就到衛生間找阿司匹林。可是她沒有找到，這時她想起來在車上還有一瓶。她不敢深夜獨自出去，於是就叫醒她的丈夫，讓他出去從車上拿那瓶阿司匹林。晃晃悠悠的丈夫穿上睡袍，東倒西歪地走出門外。他在汽車儀表盤的貯物箱裡找到了阿司匹林，當他準備回房間時，他想不起來到底哪間才是他的房間。
He thinks and thinks and then gets an idea. He opens the car again and honks the steering wheel horn several times. Within a minute，all the motel’s windows lighten up--except one window, and of course, he makes for the room with that window.
他想來想去，最後想出了一個主意。他開啟車門然後按起了喇叭。不到一分鐘，整個汽車旅館裡除了一間還黑著燈，所有的窗戶都亮了。當然，因此他找到了自己的房間。
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