適合初一水平的英語笑話
笑話是民族文化及社會生活中不可缺少的一環,從古至今都擁有廣大的受衆,深受人們喜愛。本文是適合初一水平的英語笑話，希望對大家有幫助!
This one will perhaps only be good for your more advanced students.
A piece of string walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman refuses to serve him saying rudely, 'Sorry but we don't serve the likes of you. Get out!'
The piece of string leaves the bar feeling glum, he walks down the road and then he sees two girls who he asks for help. 'Please,' he says to one of the girls, would you tie a knot in me?' This she does. 'Please,' the piece of string says to the other girl,'would you mind taking your comb and fluffing out the ends of my string?' so the girl obliges.
'Thank you' says the string and he turns around, goes back into the bar and immediately orders a drink again.
The barman looks at him quizzically and says 'aren't you the piece of string that was in here a moment ago?'
'No' came the answer, 'I'm a frayed knot.'
Submitted by: Catherine
適合初一水平的英語笑話篇二Three rich brothers each wanted to do something special for their elderly mother on Mother's Day. The first brother bought her a huge house. The second brother gave her a limousine, with a driver. The third brother remembered that his mother used to love to read the Bible, but couldn't see well anymore, so he got her a specially trained parrot that could recite any verse from the Bible on demand.
Soon, the brothers received thank-you notes from their mother. The first son's note said, "The house you bought me is much too big! I only live in a small part of it, but I have to clean the whole thing!" The second son got a note that said, "I rarely leave the house anymore, so I hardly use the limo you gave me. And when I do use it, the driver is so rude!" The third son's note said, "My darling baby boy, you know just what your mother loves! The chicken was delicious!"
Teaching Notes: We previewed some of the vocabulary, such as limousine, trained, delicious, and gave a printed copy of the joke to the students as part of a reading activity. We knew they were finished when they started chuckling. If the reference to the Bible would be inappropriate for your class, you might adapt the joke by substituting "the classics")
Submitted by: Eve Ross
適合初一水平的英語笑話篇三George was taking care of a parrot for his aunt. This parrot was a very nasty parrot. It cussed and screamed and made fun of George, so he took the parrot and put it in the freezer.
The parrot kept screaming and insulting George until finally it stopped.
George thought to himself, "On no! I froze my aunt's bird to death."
He opened the door and saw the bird alive!
The bird said, "I'm sorry for my behaviour and will never act up again.
George said, "Why the change?"
The bird answered, "Because I saw what you did to the other bird.
(HInt: He saw the frozen chicken.)
Submitted by Erin McCluskey
適合初一水平的英語笑話篇四A preacher was told by his doctor that he had only a few weeks left to live.
He went home feeling very sad, and when his wife heard the sad news she said to him, "Honey, if there's anything I can do to make you happy, tell me."
The preacher answered, "You know, dear, there's that box in the kitchen cabinet with what you always called "your little secret" in it and you said you never would want me to open it as long as you lived. Now that I'm about to go home to be with the Lord, why don't you show me what's in that secret box of yours?"
The preacher's wife got out the box and opened the lid. It contained $100,000 and three eggs.
"What are those eggs doing in the box?" the preacher asked.
"Well, Honey," she replied, "every time your sermon was really bad I put an egg in the box."
Now the preacher had been preaching for over forty years, and seeing only three eggs in that old shoe box, he started to feel very proud about himself and it warmed his soul.
"And what about that $100.000?"" he asked.
"Oh, you see," she whispered softly, "every time there were a dozen eggs in the box, I them."
Submitted by Tim Allen, Switzerland
適合初一水平的英語笑話篇五A man goes out of prison after twenty years. He decides to go back to the neighbourhood where he lived. When he gets there he cannot recognize the place. Everything has changed a lot. The places he used to visit have all disappeared. Even the pub has is very tired and would like to have something to eat. He goes into a small café and has a coffee and a he takes out his wallet he finds a shoemaker ticket in it.
He then remembers that the last thing he had done before being arrested was to take a pair of shoes to the shoemaker's. He decides to go there and try. What a wondeful thing! The shoemaker is still at the same place. He gets into the shop and tells the shoemaker that about twenty years before he had left him a pair of shoes to have them repaired. The shoemaker has a look at the ticket and says: "O.K. Come back tomorrow. They will be ready then." Some things never change.
Submitted by Christine MAZEAU
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