簡短英語笑話短文精選

英語笑話是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透過笑話我們可以看到一個民族的生存環境、生活方式、社會關係和心理特徵等等。小編精心收集了簡短英語笑話短文，供大家欣賞學習!

　　簡短英語笑話短文：No Touching

John said to Mary, "I'll bet you ten cents I can kiss you on the lips without touching them."

"You're crazy," said Mary. "That's impossible. Here's a dime that says you can't."

The two dimes were placed on the mantelpiece and John then enfolded Mary and for ten minutes kissed her passionately, intimately, and moistly.

She broke away at last, panting and disheveled, and said, "You did nothing BUT touch my lips."

John pushed the dimes toward her and said, "So I lose."

　　簡短英語笑話短文：Wake Up!

A teacher is droning away in the classroom when he notices a student sleeping way up in the back row. The teacher shouts to the sleeping student's neighbor, "Hey wake that student up!"

The neighbor yells back, "You put him to sleep, you wake him up!"

　　簡短英語笑話短文：I'm Trying to Stop It

"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?"

"No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I am trying to stop it."

　　簡短英語笑話短文：Buying a Horse

Lil' Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horses' legs, rump, and chest.

After a few minutes, Johnny asked, "Pop, why are you doing that?"

"Because I'm thinking of buying these horses."

Johnny looked worried, "Then I think we'd better hurry home right away!"

"Why?" his father asked.

"Because the UPS man stopped by yesterday, and I think he wants to buy Mom!"

　　簡短英語笑話短文：Hamburgers

I took my 4 year old son, Jacob, out to McDonald's for dinner one evening for a "guy night".

As we were eating our hamburgers, Jacob asked "Daddy, what are these little things on the hamburger buns?"

I responded that they were tiny seeds and were ok to eat.

He was quiet for a couple of minutes and I could tell he was in deep thought.

Finally, Jacob looked up and said, "Dad, if we go home and plant these seeds in our backyard, we will have enough hamburgers to last forever."

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