談戀愛怎樣才能不嫉妒大綱

You know jealousy only hurts you and your partner - but you're only human, right? Here, experts share their tips for beating the green-eyed monster and strengthening your relationship.

你知道的，嫉妒只會對你和另一半造成傷害--但你也只是人（是人就會嫉妒），對不？在此，專家分享了他們克服嫉妒，增強戀情的小妙招。

Treat Yo' Self

對自己好

"When you're in a good place yourself - thriving in the workplace, living a harmonious home life, good health, experiencing solid spirituality - your heart naturally expands, allowing you to let go of bitterness and jealousy. Living your best life helps you stay open and understanding to the ups and downs of the human condition. This compassion for yourself and others makes you less competitive. Accept yourself the way you are and do things for yourself that make you genuinely happy and fulfilled." -Anjhula Mya Singh Bais, Ph.D., International Psychology

"當你自身狀態很好時--事業風生水起、家庭生活和諧、身體健康、精神純淨--那麼你的心胸自然寬廣，讓你忘掉痛苦和嫉妒。過着最好的生活能讓你保持開朗，理解自身狀況的起起伏伏。對自己和他人的這種同情會降低你的競爭力。接受本真的自己，爲自己做事，這樣你纔會真正的感到開心、充實。"--國際心理學博士Anjhula Mya Singh Bais

Acknowledge and affirm your partner's feelings

察覺並確認另一半的感覺

"To nip jealousy in the bud, first you have to take ownership of your feelings and understand how your behavior impacts your partner. For example, if your partner does not feel good when you stay out late with a co-worker, this doesn't mean that you acquiesce to everything your partner wants. However, it goes a long way when you say to your partner, 'I know that you feel upset with the amount of time and attention that I am giving to this other person. I don't want you to feel that way.' With that statement, you acknowledged how your partner was feeling and you told them that you don't want them to be hurt by your behavior." -Chantel Cohen, owner of CWC Coaching and Therapy in Atlanta, GA

"想要將嫉妒掐滅在萌芽之中，那你首先得了解自己的感情、明白自己的行爲會如何影響另一半。比如，如果你和同事在外呆到很晚讓另一半很不爽，這並不意味着你默認了另一半想要的一切。然而，你可能要過很久纔會對另一半這樣說，'我知道你不開心，不開心我和另一個人共處那麼久、不開心我對他的關注。我不想你這樣。'說完這句話後，你承認了另一半的感情，而且還告訴他你不想因爲自己的行爲而讓他受傷。"--喬治亞州亞特蘭大CWC Coaching and Therapy的老闆錢特爾·科恩

Keep a gratitude journal

記錄讓你感恩的事

"Jealousy stems from an inherent belief of lack and scarcity, and a feeling of fear and threat. When we make it a point to remember all the things we have to be grateful for, we challenge that assumption of scarcity. By being grateful we realize that no matter what we have experienced in life thus far, on a fundamental level, we have always been ok and will continue to be so. When we change and reframe the script to one of gratitude for the things we have, and the idea that there is plentitude for all, jealously wanes." -Bais

"嫉妒來源於缺少和稀有的固有觀念，以及擔心感和威脅感。當我們記錄下所有值得我們感恩的事情，我們就挑戰了稀有的假設。懂得感恩，我們就會意識到生活中無論我們至今經歷了什麼，基本而言，我們總是過得很好，而且還會繼續如此。當我們改變、重寫劇本，記錄我們應該感恩的事情，那麼所有的嫉妒都會慢慢消散。"--拜斯