如何與比自己更有魅力的人約會

'Punching above your weight' is a concept we're all familiar with when it comes to commenting, usually bitterly, on other couples. But what's less clear is how to get into that position yourself.

當帶着挖苦的語氣評論其他情侶時，我們應該都很熟悉"超常發揮"這個概念。但卻不清楚如何才能讓自己也超常發揮。

Is it blind luck? Social status (i.e. one partner has loads of money or an aristocratic heritage)? Or to be less cynical, is it something to do with 'what's inside'? A new report suggests none of the above.

這完全是碰運氣嗎？亦或是靠社會地位（例如，這個人是個土豪，或者擁有貴族遺產）？還是不要那麼憤世嫉俗呢？這與'內在美'有沒有什麼關係呢？一項新的報告顯示，以上猜測都是錯的。

It's true that, broadly, people tend to pair up with others who are genetically and physically similar to themselves - or if you're being reductive, '10s' end up with '10s' and '7s' end up with '7s'. Scientists call this 'assortative mating', and the loose explanation is that we do so to avoid our partners being lured away by more attractive competition.

大致來說，人們的確喜歡和自己有遺傳相似或身體相似的人在一起--如果你想還原場景，那就是10年代的想和10年代的在一起，7年代的想與7年代的在一起。科學家們將其稱爲"分類交配，"簡單來說，這樣做我們可以避免另一半被其他更有吸引力的競爭對手勾引。

But a study published last year in the journal Psychological Science posits a theory as to how and why 'assortative mating' occurs, and it's all about the 'friend zone'.

但去年在《心理科學》雜誌上發表的一項研究假設了這樣一個理論：'分類交配'是如何發生的以及爲什麼會發生，這都是因爲'朋友區'。

The study, carried out at the University of Texas at Austin and Northwestern University, looked into the causes of 'mixed attractiveness' relationships.

德克薩斯大學奧斯丁分校和西北大學開展了這項研究，研究了"混合吸引"戀情的原因。

Studying 267 heterosexual couples, they asked how long each pair had known each other and whether they enjoyed a platonic relationship before they began dating.

該研究對267對異性戀夫婦進行了研究，問及了每對相識的時間，以及約會後是否享受這種柏拉圖式的戀情。

The crux of what they found? Couples who were friends for longer before getting together were more likely to vary in their attractiveness, while those who began dating right away were generally the same.

他們發現的關鍵點？那些在談戀愛之前做了多年朋友的戀人更有可能在吸引力上有所不同，而那些剛認識就談戀愛的情侶，他們的吸引力基本不變。

In fact, the longer the couple had known each other first, the less likely they were to be 'matched' in how attractive they were.

事實上，戀人認識彼此越久，就越不可能因對方的吸引力'感到很搭'。

And promisingly for anyone dating someone they suspect deep down is way hotter than they are, the study also found 'no correlation' between how similarly attractive the couples were and how satisfied they were in their relationship.

有希望的是，對任何覺得對象要比自己更搶手的人來說，研究還發現：戀人之間吸引力的相似性和他們對戀情的滿意度並不相關。

Being friends is not necessarily a barrier to love, but could prove the perfect conduit for it.

你們倆是朋友的這層關係不一定會阻礙你們相愛，而且還可能給你們提供了完美的相愛渠道。

All of which may make somewhat harrowing reading for members of the Tinder age, but for those of us still occasionally meeting people outside our iPhones, this is perhaps a reason for good cheer.

對於使用Tinder的這代人而言，上述內容或多或少有些傷感，但對我們這些仍會和別人在現實生活中見面的人來說，也許該偷着樂了。