你問我答:爲何末日預言如此熱？大綱

Age: As old as idiocy itself.

時代:和愚昧本身一樣久遠。

Appearance: Back-garden bunkers, tinned food and, eventually, embarrassment.

表現:後花園地堡，罐頭食品，最終，尷尬。

Is this about Friday? It is indeed. Specifically, the moment on Friday when the whole world comes to a fiery, watery or in some other way unpleasant and cataclysmic end.

大概是在星期五嗎？確實是的。具體來說，週五的時候當整個世界進入水深火熱或其他方式的不舒服和災難性的末日之中。

As predicted by the Mayans? Actually, as predicted by absolutely no Mayan prophecies ever, but by quite a few very silly people who aren't aware that when a calendar comes to an end – even an ancient Mayan one – you just need to pop out and buy a new calendar.

正如瑪雅人預言的那樣？實際上，正如瑪雅絕對從未預言過的那樣，但不少非常愚蠢的人並不清楚當一個日曆結束——即使是古老的瑪雅日曆——你只需要跳出來再買一個新日曆。

And they've gone feverish in anticipation? You could say that. In fact, you could say a mile-high tidal wave of apocalypse fever is sweeping across the planet as we speak.

他們已經在預感中亂了陣腳了嗎？你可以這樣說。事實上，你可以說末日熱的一英里潮汐波正橫掃地球如我們所說的那樣。

Could you really? Of course. But it would be a massive over exaggeration.

你真的能？當然。但這將太過誇張。

So what is apocalypse fever, then? Just a few bulging pockets of apocalyptic stupidity.

那什麼是末日熱，然後呢？只是幾口袋鼓囊囊的末日愚昧。

Such as? Such as in Chechnya and various other parts of Russia, where politicians are calling for calm after superstitious citizens started panic-buying candles, torches, salt and matches.

比如？比如在車臣和俄羅斯各地區，在迷信公民開始恐慌性搶購蠟燭、手電筒、食鹽和火柴之後那裏的政客們正在呼籲冷靜。

Because the apocalypse will be dark and need a bit of seasoning? Presumably.

因爲世界末日將黑暗和需要一點調味料嗎？大概是的。