情感文章：分手後如何重啓美好人生

摘錄：我知道你感到很受傷，甚至瀕臨毀滅邊緣，讓此時的你去對萬物感恩似乎不太可能。但無論你怎麼想，你生命中永遠都有需要你感激的事物存在，而此時，就是你去發掘的最佳時刻。將其視爲作業，記錄下你人生中所有讓你心懷感激的事和物。如果有人上榜了-告訴他們。這樣做能讓你從痛苦中脫離出來。

　　經典情感文章：分手後如何重啓美好人生

Maybe you just got dumped, or perhaps you had the unfortunate task of breaking up with someone. Whether it was long or short term, the end of a relationship can be heart breaking. Someone who was once so close to you is now gone, and that can almost feel like a death sometimes. And in a way it is—it’s the death of love. It may feel like you’ll never get over it, but I can assure you that you will in time. One thing you can do is try and make it easier on yourself by applying some of the following tips to your post-breakup life. I’m not saying that they’ll make you feel spectacular in ten minutes’ time, but they’ll certainly make it easier to move on.

無論你是被拋棄了，還是不幸處於和愛人分手的傷痛中。無論你們戀愛時間是長還是短，結束一段戀情都會傷人至深。曾經如此形影不離，現在卻已物是人非，這感覺教人生不如死。人們稱之爲-該死的愛。好似你永遠都無法忘掉那個人，但我保證你有天終會釋懷。而分手後，你唯一能做的就是嘗試用下面的方式來減輕痛楚。我並不是說這些方式能立竿見影，但它們的確能夠舒緩你的傷痛。

k, But Don’t Obsess

思考，但不憂慮

We all need time to wallow after a breakup, but you should only allow it up until a point. What you don’t want to do is become Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction. Eventually you need to think about the breakup and the relationship reasonably. There are reasons why it didn’t work, and whether they were good ones or not you need to accept them. Think rationally about them and know that things wouldn’t be better if you were still together if you weren’t both happy.

每個人分手後都需要時間去消化，但你得有節制。你也不想成爲《致命誘惑》裏的格林。克洛斯吧。所以你得理智地看待分手和戀情。失戀都是有原因的，無論這些原因合理或是牽強。你都要理性地思考，並要知道如果兩人在一起不快樂，即便你們繼續糾纏，都不會幸福。

w Yourself a Break

給自己放個假

You’ve just been through something traumatic, and proper attention must be paid. It’s okay to give yourself a little break from life for a while. Before you start running for the kitchen knives, I mean that you need a holiday away from normality. Give yourself permission to focus on yourself and neglect some things that can handle it. Just make sure it isn’t your hygiene. Take a few days off work if you can. Indulge in some of your ‘sometimes’ foods. Do what you need to do on your vacation from the real world. Just don’t break any laws or engage in stalking.

受到創傷的你，需要一定的撫慰。你可以適當地給自己放個短假。這得在你忙於柴米油鹽醬醋茶之前，我是說你需要休個假，遠離日常瑣事。你要允許自己將焦點放在自己身上，並要忘了阻礙你放鬆的絆腳石。偶爾放縱一下你的食慾。在遠離真實世界的假期裏隨心自在做你想做的，前提是不要去作奸犯科。

3. Give Yourself Space

給自己一點空間

Even if you guys decided to remain friends, you simply have to give yourself time away from each other. If you don’t, someone is bound to get hurt further and you’ll have to deal with two emotional melting pots. Believe me, one is more than enough. Give yourself a chance to get over the person. Or, if you were the dumper, give your ex the chance to get over you. You don’t want somebody to take something the wrong way. In addition to making the healing process easier, it will also give you a better shot at being friends later down the road.

縱然你們雙方決定要繼續做朋友，你都必須給自己一點獨處的時間。如果你執意要彼此糾結，那麼有人註定要受到更大的傷害，而你也不得不去收拾兩邊的情感殘局。相信我，光是一邊就夠你收拾的了。給自己一個忘掉對方的機會。或者，如果你是拋棄方，那就給你的前任一個忘掉你的機會。你也不希望有人誤入迷途吧。另外，該方式除了能簡化治癒的過程，它還能教你怎樣在之後的人生中拿捏做朋友的尺度。

4. Let Yourself Feel

釋放自己

Bottling your emotions up simply isn’t healthy. I know it isn’t fun, but you need to have your mourning period. Let yourself cry and yell. That goes for you too, gentlemen. I’ve seen you do it with my own eyes. Doing these things are good methods of catharsis.

壓抑情緒有違健康之道。我知道發泄不怎麼好玩，但你需要這種體驗。盡情地大哭尖叫吧。這同樣適用於你，男士們。我可親眼見過你們哭號的樣子。這些都是發泄情緒的好方法。

5. Feel in an Appropriate Way

適當發泄

Again, wallowing is a necessary step in the healing process but you must not let it get out of hand. You need to let both your ex and yourself move on. This can be particularly difficult if the other person finds somebody else, but you simply need to accept it. Don’t let negative emotions rule your life forever, because the only person you’re actually hurting is yourself…

再次強調，治癒過程中發泄是必經的一步，但你必須讓情況處於掌握之中。你得讓雙方都向前看。如果對方有了新歡，這雖然特別難以接受，但你必須學着接受。不要讓消極的情緒永遠影響着你，因爲唯一會受到傷害的實際就是你自己…

6. Don’t Go Through It Alone

不要獨自舔舐傷口

Surrounding yourself with supportive, loving people is one of the best things you can do during a breakup. They will restore your self-esteem and remind you how to have fun. Also, it’s always better to have someone else to yell “bastard” with.

跟支持你、愛你的人在一起是分手後你能做的正確事情之一。他們會重建你的自信，會告訴你尋求開心的方法。當然，有個能陪你一起爆粗的人總是更好的。

7. Cleanse

清潔

I don’t mean your face, but that’s always a positive thing the time to get organized and get rid of any unwanted stuff lying around your home. This means absolutely anything of your ex’s that you’ve been holding on to for the sake of memory. You can do the mature thing and ask if you would like them back, or you could build a ritualistic fire and burn them. Your addition to keeping you busy, getting rid of old junk, particularly ones with bad memories attached, will also make you feel clean and refreshed on the inside too.

我不是說你的外在，但整理一下外表依然是個好的建議。花點時間清掃、整理一下家裏多餘的東西。這當然就是指前任遺留下的那些讓你寄託思念的物件。你可以成熟地詢問自己是否希望回首往事，或者象徵性地一把火燒掉。選擇權在你。除了使自己忙碌外，摒棄垃圾食品，特別是和痛苦回憶有關的食品，同樣能讓你由內地感到乾淨、清新。

8. Be Thankful

心懷感恩

I know that you’re feeling hurt, perhaps even crushed, and that being thankful for anything may seem impossible. Despite how you might feel, there are things in your life to be grateful for, and now is the best time to dwell on them. As an exercise, write down all of the things in your life that you’re thankful for. If there are people on the list—tell them. Doing so may just pull you out of your gloom.

我知道你感到很受傷，甚至瀕臨毀滅邊緣，讓此時的你去對萬物感恩似乎不太可能。但無論你怎麼想，你生命中永遠都有需要你感激的事物存在，而此時，就是你去發掘的最佳時刻。將其視爲作業，記錄下你人生中所有讓你心懷感激的事和物。如果有人上榜了-告訴他們。這樣做能讓你從痛苦中脫離出來。