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兒童英語笑話精選

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“哪裏有人,哪裏就有笑聲。”從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調劑品”。笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆,在人們的日常生活中起着重要調劑作用。下面本站小編爲大家帶來兒童英語笑話精選,歡迎大家閱讀!

兒童英語笑話精選

 兒童英語笑話精選:死亡訃告

The phone rang in the obituary(訃告) department of the local newspaper. "How much does it cost to have an obituary printed?" asked the woman. "It's five dollars a word, ma'am," the clerk replied politely. "Fine," said the woman after a moment. "Got a pencil?" "Yes ma'am." "Got some paper?" "Yes ma'am." "Okay, write this down: 'Cohen dead'." "That's all?" asked the clerk disbelievingly. "That's it." "I'm sorry ma'am, I should have told you - there's a five word minimum." "Yes, you should've," snapped the woman. Now let me think a minute... okay, got a pencil?" "Yes ma'am." "Got some paper?" "Yes, ma'am." "Okay, here goes: 'Cohen dead. Cadillac for Sale.'"

地方報社負責刊登死亡訃告的部門電話響了。“登一篇訃告多少錢?”一位女士問。“五美元一個字,太太。”書記員禮貌地回答。“好的,”女士沉默了一小會兒,“拿着筆呢嗎?”“是的,夫人。”“紙呢?”“是的,夫人。”“好的,這樣寫:‘科恩去世了’”“就這些了?”書記員疑惑地問道。“對,就這些。”“很抱歉,夫人,我剛纔沒有告訴您,在我們這登訃告最少也得五個字。”“沒錯,你就應該告訴我,”女士有點生氣了,“現在我得考慮一下,嗯…拿着筆呢嗎?”“是的,夫人。”“紙呢?”“是的,夫人。”“好的,這樣寫:‘科恩去世了,出售一輛卡迪拉克轎車。’”

 兒童英語笑話精選:想請一天假

Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. "Boss," he says, "we're doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff." "We're short-handed, Smith", the boss replies, "I can't give you the day off." "Thanks, boss," says Smith, "I knew I could count on you!"

一天,史密斯去見他的客戶部領導,“老闆”,斯密斯說,“我們家明天要大搞清潔,我老婆需要我回去幫忙清潔閣樓和車庫,搬搬挪挪什麼的。”“斯密斯啊,你也知道,我們現在人手已經不夠了”老闆說,“明天的假我是沒法給你批了”。“多謝老闆,”史密斯說,“我就知道跟着您幹準沒錯”。

 兒童英語笑話精選:停車費

A businessman walked into a New York City bank and asked for the loan officer. He said he was going to Europe on business for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000. The loan officer said the bank would need some security for such a loan. The business man then handed over the keys to a Rolls Royce that was parked on the street in front of the bank. Everything checked out and the loan officer accepted the car as collateral(抵押品) for the loan. An employee then drove the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parked it there. Two weeks later the businessman returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest which came to $15.41. The loan officer said, "We do appreciate your business and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a bit puzzled. While you were away we checked and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is why you would bother to borrow $5,000?" The business man replied: "Where else in New York City can I park my car for 2 weeks for 15 bucks?"

一個商人走進紐約一家銀行詢問信貸員。他說他準備出差去歐洲兩個星期需要借款5000美金。信貸員說銀行借款需要提供擔保品。商人馬上掏出停在銀行門前的勞斯萊斯汽車的鑰匙。一切手續辦妥後銀行信貸員接受了汽車做爲貸款的抵押。店員把汽車開到銀行地下車庫並停放在那裏。 兩個星期後商人從歐洲回來,償還了5000元借款以及15.41元的利息。信貸員問:“非常感謝您的光顧,這筆交易做得也很完美,但是我們有一個疑問,你離開後我們查了一下發現您是一個富翁。爲什麼您會不怕麻煩來這借5000元呢?” 商人回答:“除了您這我還能在紐約市的其他地方只需付款15元就能停車兩個星期嗎?”