英語短篇笑話帶翻譯精選
笑話,是民間文學中的一朵奇葩,具有語言詼諧、故事生動、短小精悍的特點。下面是本站小編帶來的英語短篇笑話帶翻譯，歡迎閱讀!
區別 Difference
"I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class," observed the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles.
"When I say, 'Good afternoon,' the undergraduates respond, 'Good afternoon." But the graduate students just write it down."
“研究生班和本科生很容易就能區別開來，”在洛杉磯加利福利亞州立大學給我們研究生上工程學課的老師如此說。
“我說‘下午好’，本科生們回答說‘下午好’。研究生們則把我說的話記在筆記本上。”
英語短篇笑話帶翻譯篇二Lawyer’s Advice
律師的忠告
A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by aman who asked advice on how to hanle his ulcer.
有一位醫生和一位律師出席一場雞尾酒會，當時有一名男子走近這位醫生詢問有關如何處理他的潰瘍的忠告。
The doctor mumbled some medical advice,then turned to the lawyer and asked,
這位醫生就咕嚕咕嚕說了一些醫療上的忠告，然後轉向這位律師。
"How do you handled the situation when you are asked for advice during a social function?"
並問他：“當你在社交宴會場合中被人詢間忠告的時候，你都怎麼處理這個情形呢?”
"Just send an account for such advice" replied the lawyer.
這位律師回答說： “就寄出一張聽取忠告的賬單呀”。
On the next morning the doctor arrived at his surgery and issues the ulcer-stricken man a $50account.
下一天早上，這位醫生來到他的診療窒;開出一張五十元賬單給這名罹患潰瘍的男子。
That afternoon he received a $100 account from the lawyer.
而在那天下午他竟然就收到一張從律師那裏寄來的一百元賬單。
英語短篇笑話帶翻譯篇三A drunk 醉漢
A police officer pulls over a guy who has been weaving in and out of the lanes.
有一位警官把一個在車道上穿進穿出，迂迴蛇行的男子攔到路邊。
He goes up to the guy's window and says "Sir,I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."
他走到這名男子的車窗旁邊說：“先生，我要你對着這個酒精測試管吹一口氣。”
The man says,"Sorry officer I can't do that.I am an I do that I'll have a really badasthma attack."
這名男子說：“對不起呀，警官，我不能吹呀。我是個氣喘病患者呀。如果我吹的話，我就會真的患很嚴重的氣喘病。”
"Ok,fine.I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample."
“ 好， 好。我要你到警察局進行血液檢驗。”
"I can't do that either.I am a I do that,I'll bleed to death."
“我也能抽血檢驗呀。我是個血友病患呀。如果我抽血檢驗，我就會流血過多而死呀。”
"Well ,then we need a urine sample."
“嗯，那我們就要你進行尿液檢驗吧。”
"I am sorry officer I can't do that either.I am also a I do that I'll get really low bloodsugar."
“對不起呀 ，警官，我也不能驗尿呀。我也是一個糖尿病患者呀。如果我驗尿的話，我的血糖就真的會變得很低。”
"Alright then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."
“好吧，那我要你出來到這邊，走這條白線。”
"I can't do that,officer."
“警官，我辦不到呀。”
"Why not? "
“爲什麼辦不到?”
"Because I am too drunk to do that."
“因爲我喝得太醉了，所以不能那麼做呀。”
英語短篇笑話帶翻譯篇四Butcher and Lawyer
肉商與律師
A dog ran into a butcher and grabbed a roast off the counter.
有一隻狗，跑進一家肉店把一塊烤肉從臺子上搶走。
Fortunately,the butcher recognized the dog as belonging to a neighbor of his.
很幸運地，肉商辨認出’這隻狗是屬於他鄰居的。
The neighbor happened to be a lawyer.
這位鄰居碰巧又是一位律師。
Incensed at the theft,the butcher called up his neighter and said,
這起竊盜激怒了這位肉商。於是他就打電話給他的鄰居說：
"Hey,if your dog stole a rasat from my butcher shop,would you be liable for the coast of themeat?"
“喂，如果你的狗兒從我的肉店偷走了一塊烤肉，你會爲這塊肉的損失費用負責任嗎?”
The lawyer replied,"Of course,how much was the roast?"
這名律師回答說：“當然會呀，這塊烤肉多少錢呢?”
"$8."Afew days later the butcher received a check in the mail for $8.
“八元。”幾天後，這位肉商收到一封郵件，裏面有一張八元的支票。
Attached to it was an invoice that read:
這張支票卻附上了一張發票，上面寫着：
Legal Consultation Service 150.
“法律諮詢服務 ：一百五十元。”
英語短篇笑話帶翻譯篇五Three Doctors
三個醫生
Three doctor are in the duck blind and bird fliesoverhead.
三名醫生藏身在觀察野鴨的隱蔽處，有一隻鳥從頭上飛過。
The general practitioner looks at it and says,
一般家庭醫生看着他說：
"Looks like a duck,flies like a duck,it's probably a duck,"
“看起來像-只鴨子，飛起來像一隻鴨子……它可能是一隻鴨子”。
shoots at it but misses and the bird flies aay.
就對着它射擊，但是沒射中，這隻鳥飛走了。
The next bird flies overhead,
第二隻鳥從頭上飛過。
and the pathologist looks at it,then looks through the pages of a bird manual,and says,
病理學家看着它，然後仔細翻翻閱好幾頁的野鳥手冊說
"Hmmmm,green wings,yellow bill,quacking sound,might be a duck."
“嗯……綠色的翅膀，黃色的鳥嘴，嘎嘎的叫聲……可能是一隻鴨子。”
He arises his gun to shoot it,but the bird is long gone.
他舉起他的槍來射它，但是這兵鳥飛一了好遠。
A third bird flies over .
第三隻鳥從頭上飛過。
The surgeon raises his gun and shoots almost without looking,brings the bird down,and turnsto the patholoogist and says,
外科醫生舉起他的鬆，看都不看就射擊，把鳥擊落後就轉向病理學家說：
"Go see if that was a duck."
“你去看看那是不是一隻鴨子。”
英語短篇笑話帶翻譯篇六Bring me the winner
-- Waiter, this lobster has only one claw.
-- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight.
-- Well, bring me the winner then.
給我那個打贏的吧
-- 服務員，
這個龍蝦只有一隻爪。
-- 對不起，先生，這隻肯定打過架了。
-- 哦， 那給我那個打贏的吧。
英語短篇笑話帶翻譯篇七Dick was seven years old, and his sister, Catherine, was five. One day their mother took them to their aunt's house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes.
The children played for an hour, and then at half past four their aunt took Dick into the kitchen. She gave him a nice cake and a knife and said to him, "Now here's a knife, Dick. Cut this cake in half and give one of the pieces to your sister, but remember to do it like a gentleman."
"Like a gentleman?" Dick asked. "How do gentlemen do it?"
"They always give the bigger piece to the other person." answered his aunt at once.
"Oh" said Dick. He thought about this for a few seconds. Then he took the cake to his sister and said to her,"Cut this cake in half, Catherine.".
迪克年齡七歲，他的妹妹凱瑟琳五歲。一天，媽媽把他們帶到姨媽家去玩，自己就到大城市去買些新的衣服。
孩子們玩了個把小時，在四點半的時候，姨媽領着迪克走進了廚房。她交給迪克一塊精美的蛋糕和一把刀子，並對他說：“喏，迪克，給你刀子，把這塊蛋糕一切爲二，給你妹妹一塊。不過，你得記住要做得像一個紳士那樣。”
迪克問：“像一個紳士?紳士怎樣做呢?”
他姨媽馬上回答說：“紳士總是把大的一塊讓給別人的。”
迪克說了一聲“噢”。他對此想了一會，然後，他把蛋糕拿給妹妹，並對她說：“凱瑟琳，你來把這塊蛋糕一切爲二吧。”
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