關於超級搞笑英文笑話精選
民間笑話是一種根植於日常生活的美學形態。笑話產生於日常生活語境之中,以消遣和娛樂爲目的,由普通民衆創造、表演和欣賞。本文是關於超級搞笑英文笑話，希望對大家有幫助!
A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says, "You can't bring that dog in here."
"You don't understand," says the man. "This is no regular dog, he can talk."
"Listen, pal," says the bartender. "If that dog can talk, I'll give you a hundred bucks."
The man puts the dog on a stool, and asks him, "What's on top of a house?"
"Roof!"
"Right. And what's on the outside of a tree?"
"Bark!"
"And who's the greatest baseball player of all time?"
"Ruth!"
"I guess you've heard enough," says the man. "I'll take the hundred in twenties."
The bartender is furious. "Listen, pal," he says, "get out of here before I belt you."
As soon as they're on the street, the dog turns to the man and says, "Do you think I should have said 'DiMaggio'?"
關於超級搞笑英文笑話：I Want To Suck Your BloodDracula decides to carry some sort of a competition to see which is the finest bat to stand on his side. The rules were simple. The bat who drinks the most blood would be the winter. He selects his three top bats to compete.
So the first bat goes and comes back after 10 minutes. Her mouth was full of blood. Dracula says: "Congratulations, how did you do that?" The bat said: "Do you see that tower? Behind it there is a house. I went in and sucked the blood of all the family."
"Very good," says Dracula.
The second bat goes and comes back after 5 minutes all her face covered in blood. Dracula astonished says, "How did you do that?" The bat replies, "Do you see that tower? Behind it there is a school. I went in and drunk the blood of all the children."
"Impressive," Dracula replies.
Now the third bat goes and comes back after three minutes literally covered in blood from top to toe.
Dracula is stunned. "How on earth did you do that????" he asked.
And the bat replies. "Do you see that tower?"
Dracula replies, "Yes."
And the bat says, "Well, I didn't."
關於超級搞笑英文笑話：Talking Dog For SaleA guy is driving around the back woods of Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: "Talking Dog For Sale."
He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the back yard. The guy goes into the back yard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there. "You talk?" he asks."
Yep," the Lab replies.
After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says "So, what's your story? "The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders; because no one figured a dog would be eaves- dropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running."
"But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so Idecided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm justretired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog. "Ten dollars," the guy says "Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"
"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that stuff."
關於超級搞笑英文笑話：Three Dog NightThree handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, enticing, female poodle. The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to reach her first, but end up arriving in front of her at the same time. The males are speechless before her beauty, slobbering on themselves and hoping for just a glance from her in return.
Aware of her charms and her obvious effect on the three suitors, she decides to be kind and tells them "The first one who can use the words "liver" and "cheese" together in an imaginative, intelligent sentence can go out with me."
The sturdy, muscular black Lab speaks up quickly and says "I love liver and cheese."
"Oh, how childish," said the Poodle. "That shows no imagination or intelligence whatsoever."
She turned to the tall, shiny Golden Retriever and said, "How well can you do?" "Ummmm...I HATE liver and cheese," blurts the Golden Retriever.
"My, my," said the Poodle. "I guess it's hopeless. That's just as dumb as the Lab's sentence."
She then turns to the last of the three dogs and says, "How about you, little guy?"
The last of the three, tiny in stature but big in fame and finesse, is the Taco Bell chihuahua. He gives her a smile, a sly wink, turns to the Golden Retriever and the Lab and says...
關於超級搞笑英文笑話：Talking Dog For SaleA guy is driving around the back woods of Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: "Talking Dog For Sale."
He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the back yard. The guy goes into the back yard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there. "You talk?" he asks."
Yep," the Lab replies.
After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says "So, what's your story? "The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders; because no one figured a dog would be eaves- dropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running."
"But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so Idecided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm justretired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog. "Ten dollars," the guy says "Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"
"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that stuff."
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