一位母親寫給女兒的信美文

Dear Girls,

我親愛的孩子們，

You're so young right now, but I hope these letters will be helpful to you one day when you're older. There is so much I wish I could ask my mother now that I am a grown woman. There is so much we never got to talk about. I'm planning on being around for you well into your lives and adulthood, but even so, I think having these letters will be useful in some way. Who knows how things might change down the road, and at least you'll have your 34-year-old mother's thoughts down on paper.

Anyway, I want this letter to be about beauty and my relationship to it. I feel this enormous responsibility, as a mother of two little girls, to lead you down a path that is relatively healthy when it comes to beauty and self image. In a lot of women's eyes I've probably already failed in that respect due to the amount of pink-princess-Barbie mess cluttering up Vera's room right now.

你們現在如此稚嫩，但我希望將來某一天等你們長大了，這封信將會對你們有幫助。作爲一個成年女人，我也有很多想問我媽媽的問題，有很多我和她從未談及過的事情。在你們的成長中，我會在你們身邊幫你們過好生活長大成人，但即使這樣，我認爲這封信也能通過其他方式使你們獲益。誰也不知道將來會發生什麼，但至少你們會有我這個34歲的母親把想法寫下來供你們參考。

不管怎麼樣，我希望談談關於美以及我對美的看法。作爲一個有兩個女兒的母親，在談到美和自身形象的問題，我有重要的責任爲你們引導相對健康的認識之路。雖然在許多女人眼裏，我這方面做得並不值得稱讚，因爲現在在Vera的房間裏還亂糟糟地塞滿了卡哇伊的芭比娃娃。

But I will say this about Barbie (and all the rest of that princess garbage): I played with that stuff for a solid decade when I was growing up and here I am now at a healthy weight with a healthy outlook about my body and image. I have a masters degree and have a successful career and a published book. If Barbie were really so damaging to my femininity and self-image I highly doubt I could list all of the latter as accomplishments.

But I get it too. It's hard for women to maintain a healthy self-image. It's hard not to obsess over our weight and to wish we could afford more stylish clothes. It's hard not to covet someone else's hair or hips or eyelashes, and to spend inordinate amounts of time trying to achieve looks that we were never suited for in the first place.

但對於芭比娃娃(以及系列相關的公主垃圾玩具)我想說的是，我小時候玩了整整十年的洋娃娃，現在我是一個擁有體重標準、保持健康外貌的女性，我獲得了碩士學位，我事業成功還出版了一本書。如果芭比娃娃真的對我的女性特質和個人形象有破壞性的影響，那麼我真是非常懷疑我列出的那些成就是怎麼來的。

但是我也懂，對女人來講保持健康的形象很不容易。想要不被體重困擾，不奢求自己能有經濟能力購買更時尚的衣服，這真的很難;不覬覦別的女生的髮型、翹臀和睫毛，不在自己身上無節制的花時間試圖讓自己駕馭那些完全不適合的造型，這些也都太難了。

I have girlfriends around whom I have to brace myself to see, because even though I love them, just being around them makes me self-conscious. I look at old pictures of my mother and wonder why I've never been able to be as skinny as she was. And then I have friends who are thinner than their mothers ever were. We women go round and round in circles, holding hands and trying to be one another sometimes.

Men like to think we dress and style ourselves for them, but why would we when they hardly notice? I've never tried so hard to look good as when I know I'm about to meet up with a stylish girlfriend. It's she who will notice my slimmed down waist or the thinnest, little bracelet on my arm.

我身邊有一羣女性朋友，雖然我很愛她們，但每次跟她們接觸我都需要打起精神，只是和她們待在一起我都會覺得不自然。看着我媽媽的老照片，我總是納悶爲什麼自己永遠不能像她那麼骨感，然後我發現身邊有朋友比她媽媽年輕時還要瘦。我們女人總在轉圈圈，有時還牽着彼此的手試着扮演對方的角色。

男人以爲我們穿衣服打扮自己是爲了給他們看，但爲什麼當男人幾乎不去注意這些時我們依然樂此不疲呢?在我知道自己馬上將會見一個時髦的女性朋友之前，我就會非常非常努力地打扮自己，讓自己看起來容光煥發。而她也肯定會注意到我苗條的腰線和手臂上纖細精巧的手鐲。

And I have no doubt that the two of you, Veronica and Juliette, will endlessly compare yourselves to each other. You will wonder why one of you got longer legs or shinier hair or bigger breasts or thicker eyelashes. I know this, not because I know sisters, but because I know women. The thing I'll tell you, the thing to remember is this: not even the prettiest of us feel settled. The girl you think looks the most perfect in all the world is probably the girl who wants to change herself more than anyone else.

Don't take these on. Don't let that message carry any weight within yourselves. You are not worthless. You are so full of love and light and you should let it shine through you every second of every day. If someone pushes you down for standing tall then just push yourself back up and stand even taller. And know that the reason they pushed you down in the first place is just because they're scared. I will tell you that I have never in my life felt more beautiful than when I have stood my tallest.

毫無疑問，我親愛的女兒維多妮卡和朱麗葉，你們以後也會無止境地相互比較。你們會鬱悶爲什麼對方的腿比自己長，頭髮比自己亮，胸部比自己豐滿或者她有更濃密的睫毛。我懂這些，不是因爲我瞭解姐妹關係，而是我瞭解女人。我要告訴你們而你們必須牢記的一件事是：即使最漂亮的女人也沒有安全感，在你眼裏最完美的女孩或許比任何人都想改變自己。

不要太在乎這些，不要讓這樣的信息增加自己的負擔。你有自己獨特的價值。你的生命中充滿愛和光芒，讓它們每天每分每秒都照耀着你的生活吧!如果有人爲了站得高一點而把你推倒，那麼你得自己堅強地站起來，讓自己站得更高!要知道他們推你下去只是因爲他們恐懼。而我要告訴你們的是：當我站在人生最高處的時候，我覺得那是我覺得最美麗的時刻!

Stand tall.

昂首挺立。

Love,

愛你們的，

Mom

媽媽