玩偶的悲傷 十大能把人嚇哭的吉祥物

McDonald's (MCD, Fortune 500) new mascot, Happy, has been called "terrifying." And so it is, at least to some observers, what with its oversized, human-looking teeth; its crazed, bulging eyes; and its freakishly attenuated arms. But it's disturbing on another level, too: it was clearly the work of a focus-group-driven corporate bureaucracy trying to satisfy a lot of internal constituencies, as opposed being the original work of a creative team.

麥當勞（McDonald）的新版吉祥物Happy一直被戲稱爲“太嚇人”，至少在一些觀察家看來的確如此：擬人的大牙齒；瘋狂凸出的大眼睛；還有纖細得有些怪異的胳膊。而這個吉祥物的另一面也令人擔憂：這很明顯是焦點小組驅動的公司官僚機構爲了滿足內部支持者們的產物，而不是來自一支創意團隊的原創作品。

Obviously inspired in part by Spongebob Squarepants, it's easy to imagine that Happy was tested and retested, subjected to the scrutiny of a battery of consultants, and tweaked and retweaked until nobody was offended. That was until it was unleashed on the public -- at which point nearly everybody was offended. But as horrifying as Happy might be, he's got lots of company. See who else makes consumers squirm.

吉祥物Happy明顯受到海綿寶寶的啓發，不難想象，它肯定經過了一遍又一遍地測試，接受了一系列顧問的嚴格審查，並且不斷調整，直到沒有人感到被冒犯。但這只是在它未公開亮相之前。Happy公佈以後，幾乎所有人都感覺不舒服。但令人恐懼的Happy並不不是一個人人。讓我們來看看還有哪些令消費者不寒而慄的吉祥物吧。

The Jolly Green Giant

快樂的綠巨人

The Jolly Green Giant was such a popular character that the company he represented, the Minnesota Valley Canning Co., took his name in 1950. But in his earliest iterations in the '20s and '30s, the Green Giant didn't always seem so jolly. In fact, it was the future ad wizard Leo Burnett who in 1935 added the "Jolly" to the Green Giant's name and who took the first steps toward making him less terrifying in print ads, in part by replacing his scowl with a smile. In the character's first TV spots in the '50s, though, the giant was scarier than ever. Finally the by-then-thriving Burnett agency discovered that by downplaying the his presence, he was not only far less frightening, but also far more effective.

快樂的綠巨人深受人們喜愛，因此明尼蘇達山谷罐頭公司（Minnesota Valley Canning Co.）1950年註冊了這個名字，用他作爲代言人。但在上世紀20年代至30年代，早期的幾代綠巨人形象似乎並不快樂。事實上，直到1935年，未來的廣告奇才李奧•貝納纔在“綠巨人”的名字前面加上了“快樂的”三個字，並開始採取措施改變印刷廣告上綠巨人令人恐懼的形象，主要做法是用笑容取代了綠巨人的怒容。但在50年代，這個角色第一次在電視上出現時，他的形象反而更加恐怖。最終，當時蒸蒸日上的貝納廣告公司（Burnett）發現，通過簡化綠巨人的形象，不僅使它不再那麼令人恐懼，而且效果更佳。

Mr. Mucus

鼻涕先生

We all complain about TMI ads that spend 30 seconds focused on some distasteful body function or embarrassing malady. But hey, products for gross stuff deserve marketing too. Enter Mr. Mucus, which can most accurately be described as an anthropomorphized glob of snot. He is the villain in a series of spots for Mucinex, the expectorant originally marketed by Adams Respiratory Therapeutics. But Mr. Mucus might soon meet his demise: Reckitt Benckiser, which acquired Adams in 2007, is reviewing its advertising and might end the phlegmy foe's 10-year run.

有些廣告會用30分鐘描述一些令人不快的身體機能或令人尷尬的疾病。我們往往會抱怨這種信息量過多的廣告。但別忘了，針對令人噁心之物的產品也應該有開展市場營銷的機會。讓我們看看“粘液先生”吧。準確地說，粘液先生是一滴擬人化的鼻涕。在祛痰藥物Mucinex的一系列廣告中，粘液先生一直扮演大反派。這款藥物最初由亞當斯呼吸道藥品公司（Adams Respiratory Therapeutics）銷售。不過，粘液先生的使命或許即將結束：亞當斯呼吸道藥品公司於2007年被利潔時集團（Reckitt Benckiser）收購。後者目前正在評估亞當斯呼吸道藥品公司的廣告，或許將終止這款祛痰藥長達10年的系列廣告。

Wenlock and Mandeville

文洛克與曼德維爾

The pre-jolly Green Giant proved that original, creative ideas aren't always good. But as McDonald's "Happy" shows, soulless, systematized, bureaucratic approaches to mascot development (and most other kinds of development) almost never produce anything worthwhile. It reportedly took 18 months and 40 focus groups to come up with Wenlock and Mandeville, the cycloptic creatures that represented the 2012 Olympics in London. One critic decided the pair was the result of a "drunken one-night stand between a Teletubby and a Dalek."

之前的“快樂的綠巨人”證明，原創的、有創意的設計不一定總是好的。但麥當勞的新吉祥物“Happy”卻表明，在吉祥物創作（和幾乎其他大多數類型的研發）過程中，缺少靈魂的、系統性的、官僚主義的方式基本不可能誕生出有價值的作品。據報道，有40個焦點小組歷時18個月纔想出文洛克和曼德維爾——代表2012年倫敦奧運會的兩個獨眼生物。一位批評家表示，這兩個生物是天線寶寶（Teletubby）和戴立克（Dalek）酒後一夜情的產物。

Mr. Six

6號先生

Imagine Uncle Junior from The Sopranos dancing wildly while in the deepest throes of a month-long meth tweak, and you have Mr. Six. The mascot for the Six Flags theme parks was introduced to the public for some reason in 2004. Although creatively speaking not much above a rappin' grandma, Mr. Six proved to be effective, especially among kids, and has been widely parodied. Nevertheless, when Washington Redskins owner Daniel Snyder purchased Six Flags in 2005, he announced the very next day that Mr. Six would be deep-sixed. He was brought back in 2005, prompting Time magazine to wonder: "Why Is Six Flags Targeting Kids with a Creepy Old Guy?"

大家可以想象一下《黑道家族》（The Sopranos）中的尤尼奧爾叔叔在戒毒一個月期間毒癮發作最痛苦時瘋狂跳舞的情景，這便是6號先生。六旗主題公園（Six Flags）2004年因爲某些原因推出6號先生作爲自己的吉祥物。雖然從創意來說無法超越“說唱祖母”，但事實證明，6號先生產生了很好的效果，尤其是受到了孩子們的歡迎，而且得到了許多人模仿。2005年，華盛頓紅人隊（Washington Redskins）老闆丹尼爾•斯奈德收購六旗主題公園，交易第二天，他便宣佈放棄使用6號先生。但在2005年，這座公園重新啓用了這個吉祥物。《時代》（Time）雜誌不由得發出疑問：“以兒童爲目標羣體的六旗主題公園爲什麼用一個古怪的老傢伙作爲吉祥物？”

California Raisins

加州葡萄乾

Few brand mascots are as well known as the California Raisins, and that's only partly because the desiccated Claymation characters have served as the basis for a million jokes about the aging Rolling Stones. The Raisins characters owned TV advertising in the '80s -- they had their own line of merchandise and even an Emmy-winning mockumentary, Meet the Raisins! in 1988. But let's face it, those dried grapes look as likely to eat us as we are to eat them.

很少有品牌的吉祥物能像加州葡萄乾一樣出名，而其中很大一部分原因是，在與老邁的滾石樂隊（Rolling Stones）有關的無數笑話中，這些乾癟的粘土動畫人物都是不可或缺的笑料。上世紀80年代，這幫葡萄乾人物擁有電視廣告，有自己的產品，甚至1988年的僞紀錄片《遇見葡萄乾》（Meet the Raisins! ）還曾經榮獲艾美獎。但我們不得不承認，這些乾癟的葡萄看起來像是要吃掉我們，而不是被我們吃掉。

The King

國王

Sometimes, being horrifyingly creepy is the whole idea. So it was with Burger King's "The King," which ran from 2003-2011. Meant to become a viral hit, The King succeeded -- and after people started referring to the character as "The Creepy King" (to differentiate it from its earlier, friendlier iterations), Burger King (BKW) was more than happy to accept the appellation.

有時候，讓吉祥物嚇人恰恰就是商家的目的。漢堡王（Burger King）的“國王”便是如此。漢堡王在2003年至2011年期間使用“國王”作爲吉祥物，希望他能夠獲得病毒性傳播。 “國王”果然不負衆望——後來人們開始把他稱作“恐怖國王”（爲了與之前更友好的形象區分開來），而漢堡王似乎樂得接受這樣的稱呼。

Lemonhead

檸檬頭

In its by-the-numbers interview of the branding person responsible for the revamping of the eponymous character that represents Lemonhead candy, the Chicago Tribune somehow neglected to ask, "Why are you trying to give our children nightmares?" The movie-theater staple had been produced in Chicago by Ferrara Candy Co. for 52 years. The updated mascot looks a lot like the old one, except that the old one looks a lot less likely to be carrying a length of rope.

這個吉祥物代言的產品是檸檬頭糖果。《芝加哥論壇報》（Chicago Tribune）曾對該公司負責修改吉祥物的品牌推廣人員進行過常規採訪。只是，他們似乎忘了問一個問題：“你們爲什麼想讓我們的孩子做惡夢？”芝加哥費拉拉糖果公司（Ferrara Candy Co.）生產這款主打電影院市場的產品，已有52年曆史。最新的吉祥物與“前輩”類似，只是它看起來失敗的風險會更大。

Quiznos Spogmonkeys

奎茲諾斯連鎖快餐店吉祥物

Like Burger King's "The King," the Spogmonkeys are meant to be disturbing and weird. The characters served for a time as the spokescreatures for the Quiznos sandwich chain, but were originally developed by a private citizen, Joel Veitch, and were already popular online. The campaign, while attention-getting, didn't last long, perhaps because somebody realized that advertising food by using floating, genetically mutated rodents wasn't a good idea.

與漢堡王的“國王”一樣，Spogmonkeys的目的也是爲了產生令人不安和古怪的效果。這些形象曾經作爲奎茲諾斯（Quiznos）三明治連鎖店的代言人，但它們最初確實出自普通人喬爾•維奇之手，並且早已在網上走紅。廣告雖然吸引了眼球，但並沒有持續太長的時間，或許是因爲有人意識到，用漂浮的、發生了基因突變的齧齒動物爲食物做廣告並不是什麼好主意。

The original Ronald McDonald

麥當勞叔叔原型

The Ronald McDonald we know today has had most of his personality shaved away by years of bureaucratic decision-making. But in his first iteration, played by future "Today Show" weatherman Willard Scott, he had too much personality, and might well have been the reason people started thinking of clowns as scary and creepy.

我們今天熟知的麥當勞叔叔的大多數個性早已被多年的官僚主義決策磨平。但最初由後來成爲《今日秀》（Today Show）氣象員維拉德•斯科特扮演的第一代麥當勞叔叔卻非常有個性，或許人們認爲小丑令人恐懼和古怪正是因爲受到他的影響。