雙語閱讀：前男友越多婚姻越不幸福

摘要：一項研究表明，婚前有性伴侶的女人婚姻會更爲不幸，而對男人卻沒有影響。

Women who have several sexual partners before getting married have less happy marriages - but men do no harm by playing the field,a study has found.

According to new research by the National Marriage Project, more than half of married women who had only ever slept with their future husband felt highly satisfied in their that percentage dropped to 42 per cent once the woman had had pre-marital sex with at least two partners. It dropped to 22 per cent for those with ten or more , for men, the number of partners a man they appeared to have no bearing on how satisfied they felt within a marriage.

一項研究表明，婚前有性伴侶的女人婚姻會更爲不幸，而對男人卻沒有影響。

前男友越多婚姻越不幸福

根據全國婚姻項目的最新調查，在只和自己的丈夫發生性關係的已婚女人中，超過一半都擁有幸福婚姻。然而婚前有至少兩位性伴侶的女性婚後的幸福人數只佔42%。如果性伴侶人數達到了十位以上，這個數字跌落到22%。但是男性在此方面毫無影響。

Researchers said the study showed that sex with many different partners 'may be risky' if the woman is in search of a high-quality concluded: 'Remember that what you do before you say 'I do' seems to have a notable impact on your marital future. So decide wisely.' The findings were published in 'Before 'I Do': What Do Premarital Experiences Have to Do with Marital Quality Among Today’s Young Adults?', published at the University of Virginia.

調查者表示，如果女人想擁有高質量婚姻的話，那麼婚前性伴侶太多無疑是有點危險的。調查結論稱，要記住在你和另一個人宣誓結婚之前，性伴侶的數量對將來的婚姻生活會產生很大影響，所以要明智決斷。這項調查結論被刊登在《“我願意”之前：婚前經歷對婚姻質量有何影響》上，由美國弗吉尼亞大學出版。

The report, by Galena K Rhoades and Scott M Stanley, said the first conclusion of the study was our past experiences, especially when it comes to love, are linked to our future marital quality, they said.

由加萊納·K·羅迪斯和斯科特·M·斯坦利撰寫的報告稱，第一項研究得出的結論是我們過去的經歷和未來的婚姻質量掛鉤，尤其是關乎愛情的時候。

The researchers said those who had more partners perhaps find it difficult to commit to their spouse because they were aware of the added that more experiences of breaking up can give people a 'more jaundiced view of love' which could affect future relationships.

調查者稱婚前伴侶越多，婚後越難忠誠於他們的配偶，因爲他們知道還有其他人可以替代。他們補充說，分手次數越多，人們越容易對愛情產生偏見，這也會影響他們未來的關係。

The report said: 'Many in Generation YOLO (you only live once) believe that what happens while you’re young won’t affect your future. But our research paints a different picture. This doesn’t mean that sex before marriage will doom a marriage, but sex with many different partners may be risky if you’re looking for a high-quality marriage. Having had more relationship experiences prior to marriage also means more experience breaking up. A history of multiple breakups may make people take a more jaundiced view of love and relationships.'

報告裏說：“在當下的YOLO一代(you only live once, 人生只有一次)中，很多人都相信自己還年輕，對將來不會有影響。但是我們的調查卻展現出不同的結論。然而這也不是說婚前性行爲會給婚姻判死刑。感情經歷豐富同樣意味着分手經歷豐富，這會使人們對愛情、穩定關係產生偏見。”

The study also found that couples who had more than 150 guests at their ceremony had the greatest marital quality down the line. It said: 'We think this finding has to do with making a public declaration of commitment and having community support. The more support a couple has, the better they are able to navigate the occasional choppy waters associated with marriage.'

調查同時發現，婚禮邀請賓客多於150位的新人婚後生活質量最高。報告稱：“這個結論意味着有更多人見證的宣誓結合更容易獲得支持。而新人獲得越多支持，他們越能夠經得起婚姻中的波瀾。”

The study tracked the relationships of a representative national sample in America of 1,294 unmarried men and women aged 18-34. The researchers followed the subjects for five years. In that time, 418 were married. Only 23 per cent of those who got married during the survey had sex solely with the person they married.

這項研究跟蹤調查了美國1294名男女，年齡層爲18~34歲，歷時五年。這五年中，418位踏進了婚姻殿堂，而其中只有23%在此期間只和自己的未婚夫/妻發生過性關係。

　　Marriage Partnerships

　　婚姻關係

Traditionally, the woman has held a low position inmarriage partnerships.

從傳統上講，婚姻伴侶關係中女人的地位較低，

While her husband went his way she had to wash,stitch and sew.

當她丈夫出去工作時她必須洗洗涮涮，縫縫補補。

Today the move is to liberate the woman,which may in the end strengthen the marriageunion.

當今的趨勢是解放婦女，這最終可以鞏固婚姻。

Perhaps the greatest obstacle to friendship in marriage is the amount a couple usually see ofeach other.

也許婚姻中友好關係的最大障礙是一對夫妻互相看到的時間量。

Friendship in its usual sense is not tested by the strain of daily, year-long cohabitation.

通常意義上的感情不能由經年累月的同居生活所檢驗。

Couples need to take up separateinterests as well as mutually shared ones,if they are not to get used to the more attractiveelements of each other's personalities.

如果夫妻想要使各自性格中更有吸引力的那些部分不失去新鮮感，那麼他們不但要有共同的興趣，而且要有獨立的興趣。

Married couples are likely to exert themselves for guests—being amusing, discussing withpassion and point—and then to fall into dull exhausted silence when the guests have gone.

已婚夫婦在來客人的時候會竭盡全力招待客人，談話時充滿激情，幽默風趣，談話充滿智慧，但是客人離開後便陷入了沉默的，無話可說的狀態。

As in all friendship,a husband and wife must try to interest each other,and to spend sufficienttime sharing absorbing activities to give them continuing common interests.

正如在所有的感情關係中，丈夫和妻子必須嘗試引起彼此的關注，並花費充足的時間共同分享感興趣的活動，以便維持共同的興趣。

But at the same time they must spend enough time on separate interests with separatepeople to preserve and develop their separate personalities and keep their relationship fresh.

但是同時他們必須花費足夠的時間在不同的人和興趣上，以保持和發展他們各自的個性，並保持關係常新。

For too many highly intelligent working women,home represents chore obligations,because thehusband only tolerates her work and does not participate in household chores.

對很多高智商的工作女性來說，家代表瑣碎的家務，因爲丈夫僅僅容忍她不工作，卻不參與家庭瑣事。

For too many highly intelligent working men,home represents dullness and complaints—froman over-dependent wife who will not gather courage to make her own life.

對很多高智商的工作男性來說，家代表無聊和抱怨，來自沒有勇氣創造自己生活的過分依賴於人的妻子。

In such an atmosphere,the partners grow further and further apart,both love and likingdisappearing.

在如此的氣氛下，夫妻漸行漸遠，愛和喜好通通消失。

For too many couples with children,the children are allowed to command all time andattention,allowing the couple no time to develop liking and friendship,as well as love,allottingthem exclusive parental roles.

對很多有孩子的妻子來說，孩子允許支配父母的所有時間和注意力，使得夫妻沒有時間來培養好感，感情和愛，留給他們的只是父母親的角色。