Book says Audrey Hepburn always sad From Princess Anne in "Roman Holiday" to Eliza Doolittle in "My Fair Lady," Audrey Hepburn seemed the epitome of inner calm and self-reliance. But to her son, she was a woman beset with sadness and self-doubt. "She remembered vividly the fear she felt as a child when the German troops invaded the city of Arnhem, in the Netherlands, where she spent most of the war," writes Sean Hepburn Ferrer in his new book, "Audrey Hepburn, an Elegant Spirit." "She also told us about how her brothers ate dog biscuits when there was nothing else to eat .... how the bread was green because the only flour available was made from peas. She spent the whole day in bed reading so as not to feel the hunger." Hepburn also suffered the loss of her father - not from the war, but by desertion. He left the family when war was declared, and she didn't see him until 20 years later, when she was an international movie star. Sean Ferrer, the only son of Audrey Hepburn and Mel Ferrer, was interviewed at the offices of the Audrey Hepburn Children's Fund in a venerable building a mile from the Pacific Ocean in Santa Monica. The fund is virtually a one-man operation that stages exhibits and events to benefit UNICEF, to which Hepburn devoted her final years. Her son's proceeds from the book go to the fund. About his mother's sadness, Ferrer commented: "I believe that you can't know courage without conquering fear, and you can't really know joy without knowing sadness." He explained the "screenplay" that was his mother's life was divided into three acts: 1. pursuing a highly successful film career; 2. raising her two sons (she has a son from her marriage to Italian psychiatrist Andrea Dotti); 3. devoting herself to UNICEF after the sons became adults. "I think that emotional marks are made early on," Ferrer said. "Even if you can rationalize them as you grow up, they still leave that dank sadness you can never truly shake. "That's why she believed that one of the priorities in our society should be to address the children who are in need. Not just for a cup of soup or another vitamin, but to see what war does to children and protect them as much emotionally as we should physically." Sean Ferrer is a tall, husky 43-year-old whose dark hair bears the beginnings of gray. His own professional life is divided among conducting the work of the Audrey Hepburn Children's Fund, managing his mother's legacy and pursuing his own career in films. Having grown up in the movie world, Ferrer entered the field not as an actor but in production. His efforts to produce his own movies have been unsuccessful, mainly, he said, because he refuses to appeal to commercial mediocrity. Ferrer had just returned from a book signing tour that took him to New York, Boston and Chicago. Like his parents, he had to answer the same questions over and over again - such as, Why write the book now, a decade after his mother's death? "I didn't write the book now," he explained. "I started thinking about it shortly after my mother passed away. I didn't know if it was going to be a book, but I wanted to sit down and write about this time in my life for my children." (Agencies) 從《羅馬假日》中的安妮公主，到《窈窕淑女》裏的伊莉莎·杜利特爾，奧黛麗·赫本幾乎成了內心平和與堅毅的化身。 但是，在兒子眼中，赫本卻一直被憂傷和自我懷疑所困擾。 奧黛麗·赫本之子肖恩·赫本·費勒最近出版了一本名位《奧黛麗·赫本——優雅女神》的新書，在書中他寫到：“她真切地記得，當德國軍隊入侵荷蘭阿納姆時，年幼的她是多麼恐懼。她在荷蘭經歷了許多戰爭。” “她還告訴我們，在沒有其他任何食物的情況下，她的兄弟如何去吃狗食。……麪包都是綠色的，因爲能夠得到的麪粉都是用豌豆磨成的。爲了不感到飢餓，她整天都躺在牀上看書。” 赫本的創傷並非全部來自戰爭，父親的出走讓她遭受了被遺棄之苦。戰爭打響的時候，父親離家出走。直到二十年後，赫本才又一次見到了久違的父親，那時她已成爲一位國際影星。 肖恩·費勒是奧黛麗·赫本與梅爾·費勒的獨子，他在奧黛麗·赫本兒童基金會的辦公室裏接受了採訪。奧黛麗·赫本兒童基金會坐落於聖塔莫尼卡市一座莊嚴肅穆的建築中，一英里外就是煙波浩淼的太平洋。 事實上目前只有費勒一人來打理基金會的日常事務，基金會通過舉行展覽會和其他活動來援助聯合國兒童基金會。奧黛麗·赫本晚年曾致力於這方面的工作。費勒此次出書的全部收益將歸奧黛麗·赫本兒童基金會所有。 談到母親的苦難經歷時，費勒說：“我想沒有戰勝過恐懼的人就不知道什麼是勇氣，而沒有經歷過痛苦的人就不懂得什麼是快樂。” 他解釋說，他母親的人生“劇本”可以分三幕：第一幕：追求電影事業的高度成功；第二幕：養育兩個兒子（她曾與意大利的精神病專家安德烈·多迪結婚，生有一子）；第三幕：兒子們長大成人後，她致力於聯合國兒童基金會的工作。 費勒說：“我想很小的時候感情上受到了傷害，即使長大後你可以撫平傷口，刺骨的傷痛卻早已留下，那是你永遠都無法抹去的。” “這就是爲什麼她認爲，社會的首要任務之一就是去關心那些需要幫助的孩子。僅僅是一杯熱湯或一種維生素是不夠的，我們應該關注戰爭對孩子們的影響，保護他們生理和心理都不受到傷害。” 現年43歲的肖恩·費勒身材魁梧，黑色的頭髮中隱約顯現出些許銀絲。肖恩一人身兼多職，除打理基金會日常事務、管理母親留下的遺產外，他在影視圈還有自己的事業。 在影視圈中長大的費勒選擇了電影製作而不是演戲。他努力想要製作一部自己的電影，但尚未成功，他說主要是因爲他不想求那些商業庸才們幫忙。 費勒才從紐約、波士頓、芝加哥簽名售書回來。就像他的父母一樣，他不得不一遍遍的回答同樣的問題——例如：爲什麼在母親過世10年後才寫這本書？ 費勒解釋說：“我並不是現在才寫這本書，在母親去世後不久我就有了這樣的念頭。儘管當時我還不知道能不能寫成一本書，但我確實想坐下來，爲了我的子女，記錄下我生命中的這段時光。” UNICEF：聯合國兒童基金會 (United Nations International Children's Emergency Fund) Early on：在早期
