關於前任不要再說的9件事

Obviously, when you end things with your a-hole, jerky ex, all you wanna do is talk about what a jerky a-hole he is. But before you launch into a tirade about his emotional unavailability, check out these expert tips on the etiquette of what not to say after your relationship is dunzo-at least for your own sake.
當你跟極品前任分手後，顯然最想做的莫過於到處談論他到底是怎樣一個極品。但是，在你唾沫四濺地數落他情感無能前，還是先看看下面這些內行建議，注意分手後哪些事不該再提——就當是爲你自己好吧。

1. He was broke.
他是個窮屌絲。

Everyone has a different lifestyle and just because he couldn't match yours, that doesn't mean he's a bad guy-or even cheap. Don't sound high maintenance by complaining about his lack of funds.
每個人都有各自生活方式，不要因爲他跟你不在同一檔次，就狹隘認爲他很挫或很窮。不要抱怨人家是屌絲，搞得自己多麼“白富美”似的。

2. Everything he thought/did/said was terrible.
他簡直一無是處。

Even though you broke up, you shouldn't systematically annihilate of every good thing he did or every good time you had. If someone brings up a great memory of the two of you, take a deep breath and avoid the urge to say, "Yeah, but what about the time he did [insert something horrible here]." And definitely don't badmouth your ex to the max in front of your new man. If your current BF thinks you may still have strong-even strongly negative-feelings for your past guy, he may wonder if you've actually moved on.
就算已經分手，也不要決絕地抹殺掉他的優點，或你倆在一起時的快樂時光。要是有人說起你們倆，可以試着深呼吸，不要衝口就抱怨“哼，可他做的那些挫事……”；而且，千萬不要在現任男友面前肆意詆譭前任，要不然現任男友或許會想：到現在還對那傢伙咬牙切齒，你是不是根本就沒忘記他呢？

3. He was always a jerk.
他就是個混球。

Well, then why did you date him for X number of months or even years? Saying this just makes you look bad, and worse, bitter. Sure, it's always important to look back and see if there were any red flags you missed-so you can be well aware of what to look for next time-but you don't need to broadcast all the warning signs to everyone you know.
既然他是個混球，那你還跟他談了幾個月甚至幾年的戀愛？說出這兩個字眼只會讓別人覺得你更傻更心酸。自然，分手後有必要反省自己是否忽視了某些危險信號，以免下次再犯同樣錯誤，但你完全沒必要把你倆之間的問題廣而告之。

4. You still love him.
你還愛着他。

We all go through heartache and have experienced a breakup. Telling anyone that you still love him will only prolong the healing. Fake it till you make it. Reframe this to something like, "We had a good run, and I wish him the best." Even if you don't.
誰都遇到過心碎和分手。如果逢人就說你還愛着他，這隻會讓傷痛更彌久漫長。假裝你已經不在乎他了吧！這樣慢慢就會真的忘記他。要跟自己說：“我們畢竟有過快樂時光。希望他以後一切都好吧。” 哪怕你根本不想祝他幸福。5. Anything super embarrassing about your ex.
他的超級糗事。

If you're willing to share awful story after awful story about your ex, what does this say to your pals or your current man?
如果你總是無休止地講述前任的囧聞糗事，那你想讓朋友或現任男友忍受到什麼時候呢？

6. Anything he told you in absolute confidence.
他的絕對祕密。

In that same vein, don't show you're untrustworthy by spilling major secrets about your ex's family, childhood, what have you. However bitterly things ended, the fact is that you were in an intimate relationship with this person. Often, because he's an "ex" you may rationalize that any oaths made are off the table but keeping promises and living with integrity is just a good way to lead your life.
同理，不要泄露前任家庭、童年或其他方面的祕密，搞得自己很不值得信任。不論分手多麼痛苦，也不要忘了：至少曾經你和他非常親密。有時候因爲他已經是“前任”，你會理所當然認爲你和他之間的所有承諾都已作廢——但是，遵守承諾、正直誠懇纔是美好生活的王道。

7. Qualities that you loved about your ex.
他身上那些你喜歡的優點。

Some people have the opposite problem when it comes to exes and find themselves gushing about the awesome things he did, gifts he gave you, how he made you feel special, blah blah blah. For the sake of any new relationship you might be forming, and your own sanity, get your mind-and mouth-out of the past.
相反，有些人一想起前任就會呱啦呱啦說起他做了哪些有趣的事情、送過什麼樣的禮物，或他如何讓自己覺得獨一無二等等。顧及到目前的新戀情以及你的理智，還是控制好自己的思緒和嘴巴吧。

8. How much your parents loved him.
你父母如何喜歡他。

When you take a new guy to meet your folks, don't prime him by comparing how your exes fared with your family-especially if your mom and dad loved someone you previously dated. The guy is probably nervous enough trying to live up to your (and their) expectations-he doesn't need the ghost of your ex-bf taunting him, too.
當你帶新任男友見你父母時，最好不要預先告訴他你的前任來見家長時如何如何——尤其是不要告訴他你的父母多麼喜歡你的前任。爲了達到你或你父母的期望，新任男友相比已經夠緊張了，又何苦還要遭受你前任陰影的折磨呢？

9. Negative qualities your ex had that your current guy has.
和現任男友相同的缺點。

If you really want to piss your current boyfriend off, mention that something he does that you totally hate reminds you of your ex. This kind of comment never leads to anything positive, trust us.
如果你就是想把現任男友氣走，那就跟他說：你讓我想起了前任，你倆都有同樣的毛病！相信我，這麼說的話，你絕對不會看到好臉色的。