人際關係中,不要對別人做的20件事(雙語)
There is one key factor that can either damage your relationships or deepen them. That factor is your attitude. If you're hoping to grow and maintain positive relationships in your life, read on. Below you will find a 20 step attitude adjustment guaranteed to help you do just that.
有一個可以破壞或者加深你人際關係的重要因素。這個因素就是你的態度。如果你希望在生活中保持並發展積極的人際關係，請讀這篇文章。下面你將會看到20個步驟可以確保你做到。
1. Stop holding grudges. – Grudges are a waste of perfect happiness.
不要怨恨。怨恨使你不快樂。
2. Stop complaining.–Instead, use your time and energy to do something about it.
不要抱怨。相反的，用你的時間和精力去解決問題。
3. Stop meaning what you don't say.–People can't read minds. Communicate regularly and effectively.
不要去暗示。別人不能讀懂含義。正常地、有效地溝通。
4. Stop making it all about you.–The world revolves around the sun, not you. Take a moment to acknowledge this truth on a regular basis.
不要太自我。世界是圍着太陽轉，而不是你。承認這條公理吧。
5. Stop lying.–In the long-run the truth always reveals itself. Either you own up to your actions or your actions will ultimately own you.
不要撒謊。不管多久事實總會不證自明。要麼你承認你的行爲，要麼你的行爲終會出賣你。
6. Stop blaming. –Blaming others accomplishes nothing. Either you own your problems, or they will own you. Your choice. When you blame others for what you're going through, you deny responsibility–you give-up your power over that part of your life, and you annoy everyone around you in the process.
不要責怪。責怪他人沒有任何用處。要麼你有你的問題，要麼問題屬於你。這是你的選擇。當你責怪他人的時候，你否認這種責任—你失去生活中一部分的力量，並且你會惹惱你周圍的人。
7. Stop doubting.–If you think that you can't achieve something, I have some news for you, you're probably right. But don't let your self-doubt interfere with other people's dreams. Remember, the one who says it can't be done should never interrupt the one doing it.
不要懷疑（別人的可能性）。如果你認爲你不能完成某件事，我要告訴你，你很可能是對的。但是不要讓你的自我懷疑打擾到別人的夢想。請記住，永遠不要去打擾別人在做的事情，就算你認爲它不可能實現。
8. Stop interrupting. –Correcting someone when they're blatantly wrong is one thing, but always interjecting your opinions out of turn gets old fast.
不要打擾。當別人有錯誤的時候糾正是一回事，但是常常不合時宜的插入自己的觀點容易加快變老。
9. Stop being selfish. –You get what you put into a relationship. Nothing less, nothing more.
不要太自私。在人際關係中投入多少你就會得到多少。不多也不少。
10. Stop judging. – Everyone is fighting their own unique war. You have no clue what they are going through, just like they have no clue what you’re going through.
不要武斷。—每個人都會與自己有獨特的戰爭。你沒有辦法知道他們此刻正在做什麼，就象他們也沒有辦法知道你此刻正在做什麼。
11. Stop gossiping. –Gossiping about others is a lose/lose situation. It hurts them, and then it hurts your reputation.
不要傳播流言蜚語。傳播別人的流言蜚語你會處於不利的形勢。這會傷害他們，也會損害你的名聲。
12. Stop making promises you can't keep. –Don't over-promise. Over-deliver on everything you do.
做不到的事情不要作出承諾。不要過多的承諾。要多多兌現。
13. Stop being defensive. –Just because someone sees something differently than you doesn't mean either one of you is wrong. Keep an open mind. Open minds discover great things.
不要太自衛。別人看待某件事的觀點和你不同並不意味着你們都是錯的。敞開你的心扉吧，你會有更多發現。
14. Stop comparing people to others. –No two people are alike. Everyone has their own strengths. We are only competing against our own selves.
不要拿別人和他人做比較。沒有兩個人是一樣的。每個人都有自己的優點。我們能做的是與自己競爭。
15. Stop expecting people to be perfect. – ‘Perfect’ is the enemy of ‘good.’ And genuine ‘goodness’ is hard to find in this world. Don't overlook it.
別希望別人能變得完美。—'完美'和'好'是敵人。真正的‘完美’在世界上是難以找到的。不要忽視這一點。
16. Stop trying to be everything to everyone. –It's impossible. But making one person smile can change the world. Maybe not the whole world, but their world. So narrow your focus.
不要試圖成爲每個人的一切。—這是不可能的。但是使人微笑可以改變世界。或許不是整個世界，但是能改變他們的實際。所以縮小你的焦點。
17. Stop screwing people over just because you can get away with it. –Just because you can get away with something doesn't mean you should do it. Think bigger. Do what you know in your heart is right.
不要跟損友鬼混僅僅因爲你做了壞事也不受處罰。僅僅因爲你能僥倖逃脫不受處罰並不意味着你應該這麼去做。多多思考。做你認爲對的事。
18. Stop making mountains out of molehills. – People make mistakes. Crap happens. There's no reason to stress out yourself and everyone around you because of it. One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: “Will this matter in one year's time?” If not, then it's not worth worrying about.
不要把小丘變成大山。人們會犯錯，壞事會發生。無名的壓力圍繞着你和你身邊的每一個人因爲這件事情。一種檢驗這件事是否值得去想的方式是問自己：“一年後我還會在意這件事情嗎？”如果沒有，那就不值得去煩惱。
19. Stop being dramatic. –Stay out of other people's drama and don't needlessly create your own.
不要太戲劇性。置身於別人的劇本之外並且也別去創造你自己的劇本
20. Stop giving out advice, and just listen. – Less advice is often the best advice. People don’t need lots of advice, they need a listening ear and some positive reinforcement. What they want to know is already somewhere inside of them. They just need time to think, be and breathe, and continue to explore the undirected journeys that will eventually help them find their direction.
別給太多建議，聽就可以了。沒有建議通常是最好的建議。他們不需要很多建議，他們需要有人傾聽和積極的聲援。他們想知道的已經在他們心理。他們僅僅需要時間去思考，喘喘氣，然後繼續在沒有方向的旅程中探索並且最終能幫助他們找到方向。
And remember, your relationship with yourself is the closest and most important relationship you will ever have. So pay attention to it, develop it, nurture it, and never, ever stop.
最後請記住，你和自己的關係是你有過最親密最重要的關係。所以請關注它，開發它，培養它，永遠，不要停止。
