考研英語看圖作文範例點評：考學生or烤家長

看圖作文在英語作文中是大家普遍缺乏練習的一種類型，一個提高的方式就是看範例和點評，針對其中的錯誤進行自我修正。

考學生or烤家長：

寫作原文

In the given picture, there are many parents standing at the gate of (outside)the examination room. As we see, they are so worried that the sweat began (begin)to pour down their face. In china, it is common knowledge that the exam decides (may determine)the future of children. Hence, it reflects the problem that the (加上current Chinese表意更完整)educational system is unreasonable. In fact, the problem has existed for several years. Especially in china, the examination score decides the children’s development in the future.(語法正確，但句意不合理。改爲the examination score may influence children’s future development.)In a sense, the examination seems to be the only standard that chooses the talents(can be used to select talents). Furthermore, it is so terrible educational system (the educational system is so terrible). I think we must take some effective measures to solve this problem. In my opinion, we should adopt the following measures. On the one hand, we should reform the educational institution and establish a more flexible approach to choose the talent (select talents). On the other hand, parents should give up the idea that the exam is the only key to judge (measure)children’s ability.

總體點評

本文立意正確，內容切題，結構完整，需注意以下問題：1、文章的立意雖然正確，且深入切題，但文章的內容不夠豐富充實，原因分析不夠深刻。第二段在分析造成現象的時候提出了三點“考試決定孩子的未來”“考試是選拔人才的唯一標準”“教育制度很差”——“考試爲什麼會決定孩子的未來，它怎樣決定了孩子的未來?”“爲什麼是選拔人才的唯一標準?(在現有的實情方面，因爲其他方法難以實施和操作)”“教育制度很差，體現在什麼方面?”2、文章內容的銜接邏輯不是很清楚，如第二段先說“考試決定未來”後說“考試是選拔人才的唯一標準”，而實際上“正因爲在目前考試是選拔人才的唯一標準，所以考試在某種意義上決定了孩子的未來”。3、文章依然存有少許漢式思維的句子，有的詞組搭配不合理，應在此方面加強。多模仿一些經典佳句。因此，建議作者以後在寫作之中不要提筆就寫，先列出一個大綱，把自己的思路理順，使自己的文章邏輯清晰，通順流暢。

參考分數(滿分20分)：12

英語寫作水平的提升需要不斷地練習，在改正錯誤中不斷取得進步，不怕犯錯誤，怕明知道犯錯誤卻不面對。看了範文和點評，希望大家有思考，有提高。