精選趣味英語故事

“哪裏有人,哪裏就有笑聲。”從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調劑品”。笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆，在人們的日常生活中起着重要調劑作用。下面本站小編爲大家帶來精選趣味英語故事，歡迎大家閱讀!

Two brothers, Herbert and James, lived with their mother and a cat name Edgar.

"Edgar is dead," Herbert answered.

James was particularly attached to the cat, and when he had to leave town for several days, he left Herbert meticulous1 instructions about the pet's care. At the end of his first day away, James telephoned his brother. "How is Edgar?" he asked.

There was a pause. Then James said: "Herbert, you are insensitive. You know how close I was to Edgar-you should have broken the news to me slowly. When I asked about Edgar tonight, you should have said Edgar's on the roof, but you've called the fire department to get him down. And tomorrow when I called, you could have said the firemen were having trouble getting Edgar down, but you were hopeful they would succeed. Then when I called the third time, you could have told me that the firemen had done their best, but unfortunately Edgar had fallen off the roof and was at the veterinarian's. then when I called the last time, you could have said that although everything possible had been done for Edgar, he had died. That's the way a sensitive man would have told me about Edgar, and, oh, before I forget," James added, "How is mother?"

"Uh," Herbert said, pausing for a moment, "She is on the roof."

郝伯特和詹姆斯兄弟二人一起生活，家中有一老母並養了一隻貓叫埃德加。

詹姆斯特別喜歡這隻貓。有一次他要外出幾天，臨行前不厭其煩地囑咐郝伯特照顧好這隻寵物。出門後的頭一天晚上，他打來電話詢問：“埃德加好嗎?”

“它死了，”郝伯格回答。

一陣沉默之後，詹姆斯說：“郝伯特，你太不善解人意了，你知道我與埃德加的關係有多麼好——你應該慢慢告訴我這驚人的消息。當我問起埃德加今晚怎樣時，你應該說埃德加爬上了屋頂，但是你已經叫消防的救它下來。’我明天又給你打電話時，你應該說消防隊營救埃德加遇到了麻煩，但你相信他們會成功。在我第三天給你打電話時，你可以說消防隊員已盡了最大努力，但很不幸，埃德加從屋頂上掉了下來，現在正在獸醫那裏。在我最後一次給你打電話詢問，你可以說盡管對埃德加做了一切所能做的努力，它還是死了。這是顧及別人感情的人應該說的。哦，對了，我剛纔忘了問你，”詹姆斯補充道，“媽媽怎麼樣了?”

“哦……”一陣沉默後郝伯特答道，“她上了屋頂。”

I lived in DC when I was young, and dad used to take us on weekend trips south into the Carolina, so that we could see what "real life" was like. He’d just drive along the road for a while, and then pull over at some farm and start talking to the people there.

Dad was chatting up a farmer’s wife once，when I discovered this Pig...

It was a nice pig. But it only had three legs. The right back leg was wooden! Well, I was ascurious as could be, so I asked the farmer:"Excuse me, sir. Why does your pig have a wooden leg?"

"Well, boy. That is a courageous pig. The wife and me were asleep in the house one night, when that pig came running in and woke us up. The whole place was ablaze. We just got out alive."

"And the pig got its leg burned up in the fire?"

"Nope. Pig got out just fine. Matter of fact, he even went back in and saved the kids."

"Then why does the pig have a wooden leg?"

"I told you, boy. That is a BRAVE pig! A heroic pig! That pig saved our lives!"

"Yes, sir. But why does he have a wooden leg!"

"Boy, a pig like that, you don’t eat all in one sitting!"

我小的時候生活在華盛頓。到了週末，爸爸常常帶我們到南部的卡羅萊納州去玩。正是在那裏我們看到了什麼是“真正的生活”。爸爸會沿路開一會兒車，然後把車停在路邊，找農場裏的人聊聊天。

正當爸爸和一個農婦聊天時，我發現了這隻豬……

那隻豬很漂亮，可只有三條腿，右後腿還是用木頭做的!我對這點很好奇。於是就問那個農民：“先生，爲什麼你的豬有一隻木頭腿啊?”

“是這樣的，孩子。這是一隻勇敢的豬。有天晚上，我和妻子正在房裏睡覺時，這隻豬跑進來叫醒了我們，我們才知道房子着火了。我們立刻跑了出去，才保住了性命。”

“這隻豬的腿是在那場火災中燒壞的嗎?”

“不是的，它完好無損地跑了出去。實際上，它甚至還跑了回去，把我們的孩子也救了出來。”

“那爲何這隻豬會有一隻木頭腿呢?”

“我已經告訴你了，孩子。那是隻勇敢的豬!一隻英勇的豬!它救了我們全家人的性命!”

“是的，先生。可是爲何它有隻木頭腿呢?”

“孩子，像這樣的豬，我們是不捨得一次就把它吃光的!”