調查：離婚後男人比女人更痛苦

A recent survey highlighted the fact that women tend to fare much better than men after divorce.

The survey revealed that men suffer far more in emotional terms than women — and are much more likely to let themselves go and not eat properly.

In the year after divorce, 48 percent of men describe themselves as feeling ‘very lonely’, compared with just 35 percent of women.

Men often bear the financial brunt of divorce, too, finding themselves supporting the family they have left behind and somehow having to finance a new roof over their own head, too. If they meet someone new, they are then faced with the prospect of supporting their new partner and any additional children.

Women, the survey stated, find it much easier to ‘move on’ and leave the past behind, and have a far wider emotional support network of friends.

As a result, it is perhaps no surprise that more women than ever are initiating divorce. The latest UK figures for 2009 show that 68 percent of the 113,949 divorce proceedings that year were started by women.

More long-term marriages are ending, too — divorce initiated by women in the age 45-plus bracket rose by an astonishing 30 percent in the ten years between 1997 and 2007.

Leading divorce lawyer, Adam Witkover, of Bross Bennett Solicitors in London, says many women feel the rush of excitement after leaving their husbands.

He says: ‘In my experience, women seem to cope much better emotionally with divorce. They have a wider network of friends, find it much easier to talk about their emotions than men, and although they are not always better off financially, they often use divorce as the springboard to a new career.

‘Men, on the other hand, find it much harder to express how they feel, and are often much more bitter about the split than women. They seem to find it harder to let go of the past.’

Men also tend to struggle with the domestic side of living on their own — doing their own washing, shopping and cooking — whereas for women, that is a breeze.

If there are children involved, women tend to be awarded the family home, so their general lifestyle is not dramatically affected. Men, on the other hand, often struggle with the turn their lives have taken, especially if they find themselves moving into a small flat or even back in with their parents.近日的一項調查突顯了一個事實，就是離婚後女人通常比男人好過得多。

調查揭示，男性在情感上比女性遭受的痛苦要大得多，而且男性更可能自暴自棄和胡亂進食。

在離婚後的日子裏，48%的男性稱自己感到“十分孤獨”，相比之下，只有35%的女性是這樣。

男性通常還要遭受離婚帶來的經濟衝擊，他們不但要支撐之前的家庭，還要承擔自己新立門戶的開支。如果他們找到了新歡，他們可能還要撫養新伴侶和她帶來的小孩。

調查稱，離婚後女性“繼續前進”、忘掉過去比男性容易得多，而且女性所擁有的能提供情感支持的朋友圈也比男性大得多。

所以，如今提出離婚的女性比以往任何時候都多大概也就不足爲奇了。2009年英國最新數據顯示，2009年的113949起離婚訴訟中，有68%是女性提出的。

此外，更多的長久婚姻正走向盡頭——45歲以上女性提出的離婚在1997年到2007年這十年間增加了30%，這很驚人。

倫敦布羅斯•貝奈特律師事務所的資深離婚律師亞當•維特考佛說，許多女性在離開丈夫後感受到了涌動的激情。

他說：“根據我的經驗，女人們似乎能更好地接受和應對離婚。她們的朋友圈子更大，因此要傾訴心情也比男性容易得多。另外，儘管女性的經濟狀況並不一定會因離婚而變好，但她們常常藉助離婚這一跳板來開啓新的職業道路。”

“另一方面，男人要表達情緒則比女人難得多，而且離婚對於男人通常也更痛苦。要他們忘掉過去似乎更難。”

此外，男人獨自生活還要艱難應對家務事——自己洗衣、購物和做飯，而這對於女人來說，就是小菜一碟。

如果離婚時雙方已有子女，一般會把房子判給女性，這樣女性的生活方式總體上不會受到太大影響。而男性則通常必須艱難地應對生活的劇變，特別是搬進小公寓甚至搬回去和父母同住的男性。