痛苦的離婚過程讓我更想再婚
My Painful Divorce Only Made Me Want to Get Remarried Even More
痛苦的離婚過程讓我更想再婚
My first marriage was falling apart, imploding at every turn. The love, or whatever was left of it, was going to end whether I liked it or not. It was a bitter pill I spent the months leading up to our split trying to swallow.
我的第一段婚姻失敗地很徹底。愛情，或者剩下的一切，不管我願不願意，都即將結束了。我花了好幾個月的時間才從‘悲傷’中逐漸恢復。
But regardless of how painful the ending of a marriage can be, a sentiment echoed in my heart and mind every day and it was too loud to be ignored as my first marriage inched closer to its impending fate. I wasn't done with love yet and wanted to be remarried after divorce.
但不管這段婚姻的結束有多麼痛苦，我的腦海中每天都還是迴盪着一種情緒，而隨着第一段婚姻即將告一段落，這種情緒越發明顯——我還沒有失去愛的能力，離婚後我還想結婚。
My heart was split in two. Half of it was in a constant ache from the reality of what was to come of my marriage. But the other half was hopeful and almost all-knowing that a greater love was out there waiting for me. In good time, my heart would feel whole again.
我的心被分成了兩半。一半因爲婚姻破裂的現實而不停地疼痛，而另一半卻又充滿希望，認爲會有那麼一個人在等着愛我。慢慢地，我的心將再次完整。
On a cool-for-Miami March morning, the day I dreaded for so long had come: My marriage was over. As my ex-husband left the home for good, I prepared for life as a single mother. My then 2-year-old and I quickly made a warm, loving home out of our brand-new townhouse for two, and without skipping a beat—aside from a bout of flu that hit us both almost instantly—life went on.
在三月份一個蕭瑟的早晨（邁阿密），我害怕已久的那一天到來了：我的婚姻結束了。前夫永遠地離開了我們的家，我也開始準備做一位單身媽媽。那時，我和我2歲的孩子很快就從新買的別墅中收拾了兩間房，開始了充滿溫馨和愛的生活——除了一場流感幾乎將我倆都打倒外，我們生活得很好——生活也還在繼續。
That constant ache now replaced by adrenaline, forced me to keep moving forward in whatever way I felt was best for my daughter and me. But I still clung on to the belief that something was coming, something greater than I had ever known, and it was this sense of knowing that brought me peace every night when I lay my head down at night.
那種持續的痛苦現在已被腎上腺素所取代，迫使我爲了女兒和自己以最好的姿態繼續生活。但我仍舊堅信，愛會來臨的，這種愛比以往遇到的更爲熱烈，而每晚撫我安睡、伴我入眠的正是這一信念。
That's not to say this time in my life wasn't difficult. It was—single motherhood is not for the faint of heart. "All I know, is that I'm not done with love yet," I'd tell anyone who inquired about my next steps.
但這並不表示離婚後的那段日子並不辛苦。事實上，日子真的很難——但女子本弱，爲母則剛。“我只知道，我還沒有失去愛的能力，”我會對每一位關心我日後生活的人如是說。
