經典科幻文學:《宇宙盡頭的餐館》第16章4

“Zowee,” said Zaphod, “here we are at the End of the Universe and you haven’t even lived yet. Did you miss out.”
He led her off to where the waiter had been waiting all this time at the table. Arthur followed them feeling very lost and alone.
Ford waded off through the throng to renew an old acquaintance.
“Hey, er, Hotblack,” he called out, “how you doing? Great to see you big boy, how’s the noise? You’re looking great, really very, very fat and unwell. Amazing.” He slapped the man on the back and was mildly surprised that it seemed to elicit no response. The Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters swirling round inside him told him to plunge on regardless.
“Remember the old days?” he said, “We used to hang out, right? The Bistro Illegal, remember? Slim’s Throat Emporium? The Evildrome Boozarama, great days eh?”
Hotblack Desiato offered no opinion as to whether they were great days or not. Ford was not perturbed.
“And when we were hungry we’d pose as public health inspectors, you remember that? And go around confiscating meals and drinks right? Till we got food poisoning. Oh, and then there were the long nights of talking and drinking in those smelly rooms above the Cafe Lou in Gretchen Town, New Betel, and you were always in the next room trying to write songs on your ajuitar and we all hated them. And you said you didn’t care, and we said we did because we hated them so much.” Ford’s eyes were beginning to mist over.
“And you said you didn’t want to be a star,” he continued, wallowing in nostalgia, “because you despised the star system. And we said, Hadra and Sulijoo and me, that we didn’t think you had the option. And what do you do now? You buy star systems!”
He turned and solicited the attention of those at nearby tables.
“Here,” he said, “is a man who buys star systems!”
Hotblack Desiato made no attempt either to confirm or deny this fact, and the attention of the temporary audience waned rapidly.
“I think someone’s drunk,” muttered a purple bush-like being into his wine glass.
Ford staggered slightly, and sat down heavily on the chair facing Hotblack Desiato.
“What’s that number you do?” he said, unwisely grabbing at a bottle for support and tipping it over – into a nearby glass as it happened. Not to waste a happy accident, he drained the glass.
“That really huge number,” he continued, “how does it go? ‘Bwarm! Bwarm! Baderr!!’ something, and in the stage act you do it ends up with this ship crashing right into the sun, and you actually do it!”
Ford crashed his fist into his other hand to illustrate this feat graphically. He knocked the bottle over again.

“哈……”贊福德說，“我們現在是在宇宙的盡頭，可你還沒有曾經活過這段時光。難怪你認不出來。”
他沒有再糾纏下去，和她來到了侍者一直在那兒等着的那張桌前。阿瑟跟着他們，感到非常失落，非常孤獨。
福特費力地穿過桌子堆，想和老熟人續上關係。
“嘿……嗯，霍特市萊克，”他喊道，“你怎麼樣？見到你真是太好了！你那些吵吵鬧鬧的音樂搞得如何？你看起來真的極度肥胖、非常病態，真讓人吃驚啊！”他在那個男人後背上拍了一下，發覺這一舉動似乎並沒有引起什麼反應，不由得稍覺詫異……但泛銀河系含漱爆破藥在他體內翻騰，告訴他不要理會這些。
“還記得過去那些日子嗎？”他說，“我們在一塊兒鬼混的日子……非法小酒館，還記得嗎？斯里姆的噪音商場，邪惡機場的爛醉如泥，真是美妙的日子啊，嗯？”
霍特布萊克·迪西亞託對那些日子究竟是好是壞沒有發表任何意弛。福特卻並沒感到絲毫不安，
“當餓了的時候，我們就會裝成公共衛生巡視員，你還記得吧。我們到處騙吃騙喝，對嗎？直到我們食物中毒。哦，還有那些一邊聊天一邊喝酒的漫漫長夜，在新蚍特爾的格雷琴鎮上的路易斯咖啡館樓上的那些臭烘烘的房間裏，而你總是躲在隔壁房間，試着寫你的電吉他譜子，我們都討厭那些歌，你說體不在意，我們卻說我們任意，因爲我們簡直太討厭它們了。”淚水開始涌進福特的眼睛。
“你說你並不想當明星，”他繼續說道，完全沉浸在對往昔的思念中，“我爲你鄙視明星制。我們——哈德扭、蘇利居和我——則說，我們認爲你根本沒有選擇的餘地－－看看你現在做了些什麼吧，你接受了明星制的現實！”
他轉過身來，希望引起周鬧餐桌上的人的注意。
“這裏，”他說，“坐着一個接受了明星制的人。”
霍特布萊克·迪西亞託沒有表現出任何試圖確認或否認這一說法的意思，聽衆們暫時被吸引過來的注意力很快就消散了。
“我想有的人喝醉了。”一個頭發亂糟糟的紫色生物對着自己的紅酒杯嘟噥道。
搞特微微晃了一晃，然後重重地一屁股坐在霍特布萊克·迪西亞託對面的椅子上，
“那一次你是怎麼幹的？”他說，一邊很不明智地伸手去抓一個瓶子，想用它支撐身體，但卻把它打翻了……恰好倒進旁邊的一個玻璃杯裏。爲了不浪費這次令人愉快的事故，他把這杯酒喝了個精光。
“那一次幹得太棒了！”他繼續說道，“怎麼樣的來着，‘砰！砰！乓！’，舞臺表演，你居然幹出來了，以一艘飛船直墜太陽，最終。你居然幹出來了！”
福特用拳頭去砸另一隻手掌，以便能形象地解釋這一舉動他再次把瓶子碰倒了。