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五種情況幫你認清身邊'有毒'朋友的真面目

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Whilst most of our friends are there for us through thick and thin and can always be relied on for a good time, we've all encountered the toxic friend.

雖然大多數的朋友都能有福同享有難同當、都能給我們依靠,但是我們都曾遇到過“有毒”的朋友。

Indeed, the toxic friend is the one who's more interested in your misfortunes, doesn't share your joy when you have good news and leaves you feeling utterly drained with their negativity.

事實上,有毒的朋友指的是那些對你的不幸更感興趣的人,當你有好消息時他們不但不會爲你感到高興,還會用自己的負能量來打擊消磨你。

initiates most of the contact?

1.誰聯繫得最多?

Who initiates most of the contact is an important barometer in any friendship. Friendships get toxic when one of you is way more invested than the other.

誰聯繫得最多是所有友誼中的一個晴雨表。當你們其中一人比其他人投入更多時,友誼就變得“有毒”了。

If you're mostly initiating contact, or always having to make the effort, start taking a step back to see what happens. You'll easily see which friends are meant to be in your life versus those who aren't.

如果大多數時候都是你聯繫別人,或者你總是努力這樣做的話,你可以先停下來,然後看看會發生些什麼。你會很容易地看出哪些朋友值得你交往,哪些則不值得。

do they make you feel?

2.他們讓你感覺怎麼樣?

How you feel in their company and how you feel once you've parted company is a great way to tell if you're in a toxic friendships.

和他們在一起時你是什麼感覺,和他們分開時你是什麼感覺?這是區分你的友誼是否有毒的很好方法。

If you're left feeling drained, angry or even resentful, release the friendship. You've probably outgrown each other. If, on the other hand, they leave you feeling refreshed, revitalised and alive, they're keepers.

如果你感覺沒意思、憤怒、甚至是怨恨的話,就結束這段友誼吧。你們可能已經不再適合做朋友了。另一方面,如果他們讓你覺得精神振奮、活力煥發有生氣的話,你就應該珍視和他們的友誼。

五種情況幫你認清身邊'有毒'朋友的真面目

they add or subtract to your life?

3.他們讓你的生活多了或者少了些什麼東西嗎?

Do you dread meeting up with them? If there's no fun left in your friendship, it's time to break up.

你害怕和他們見面嗎?如果你的友誼中沒有樂趣了,那就是時候結束這段友誼了。

Friendships shouldn't detract from your life, neither should you feel like you're walking on eggshells. Great friendships actually boost your immune system, while toxic friendships leave you feeling off balance.

你的生活中不能沒有友誼,但是你的友誼也不能讓你感覺如履薄冰。偉大的友誼實際上會促進你的免疫系統,而有毒的友誼則會讓你感覺失去平衡。

they support your life goals?

4.他們支持你的人生目標嗎?

Are they always criticising your hopes and dreams or are they supportive? Do they make you feel guilty for pursuing your goals? Can you count on their support when the chips are down?

對於你的希望和夢想,他們是批評還是支持?他們讓你因爲追求自己的目標而感到內疚嗎?當你境況不好時,你能指望他們支持你嗎?

Good friends want the best for you and are your biggest cheerleaders. Toxic friends will act jealous, mean spirited and may even try to sabotage your hopes and dreams.

好朋友總是爲你着想,也是你最大的支持者。有毒的朋友卻總是很嫉妒、刻薄、甚至可能會試圖破壞你的夢想和希望。

they hard to pin down?

5.他們很難約出來嗎?

If they're always 'too busy' to meet you, or, if they constantly cancel pre-arranged plans, stop investing in this friendship. Instead, invest in friends who value your time, lift you up and want to spend time with you.

如果他們總是“太忙”不能和你見面,又或者,如果他們總是不斷取消預先安排的計劃,那就不要再維持這段友誼了。相反,你應該交好那些珍稀你的時間、激勵你、想要你和一起度過時光的朋友。