離婚≠幸福

Divorce No Ticket to Happiness

Unhappily married couples often get lots of advice and a report released recently offered some more: don't divorce, stick it out. Researchers from the University of Chicago and other schools concluded that the couples who avoided divorcing despite an unhappy marriage ended up just as happy five years later as those who had split up. Interviews with a subset of the 5,232 married adults surveyed in the 1980s and again five years later found those who found happiness discovered the sources of conflict such as money, depression, and even infidelity eased with time. Others reported they got better at getting along, sometimes enlisting help from relatives or counselors ?nbsp;or by threatening divorce. Others found ways to be happier individually in spite of their mediocre marriages. But divorce sets in motion events over which an individual has little control, such as the reactions of spouses and children, as well as the uncertainty of new relationships. "Staying married is not just for the children's sake. Some divorce is necessary, but results like these suggest the benefits of divorce have been oversold," said University of Chicago sociologist Linda Waite, lead author of the report.

婚姻不幸的配偶總能得到許多忠告，最近公佈的一份報告中又有新的建議：別離婚，堅持到底。來自芝加哥大學及其他學校的研究者們得出結論，那些儘管琴瑟不調也不離婚的夫婦在5年後與那些選擇分道揚鑣的人過得一樣好。研究者們在80年代調查了5232名已婚人士並在5年後進行了複查。與他們中一部分人的訪談表明，那些覓得幸福的人發現錢財糾紛、失望情緒甚至不忠行爲等家庭衝突的導火索會隨時間流逝而淡化。另一些人說他們比以前更懂得相處之道，有時也尋求親戚和婚戀顧問的幫助——或者用威脅離婚來改善關係。有些人儘管魚水不歡，但也找到了自得其樂的方法。而離婚引發的後果是個人無法控制的，比如配偶和孩子的反應，以及新關係的不確定性等等。報告主筆、芝加哥大學社會學家琳達·韋特說：“維持婚姻不僅僅是爲了孩子。有些情形下離婚是必須的，但像這樣的（調查）結果表明離婚的好處被誇大了。”