精選英語幽默故事三則

“哪裏有人,哪裏就有笑聲。”從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調劑品”。笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆，在人們的日常生活中起着重要調劑作用。下面本站小編爲大家帶來精選英語幽默故事三則，歡迎大家閱讀!

Henry was from the United States and he had come to London for a holiday.

One day he was not feeling well, so he went to the clerk at the desk of his hotel and said, "I want to see doctor. Can you give me the name of a good one?"

The clerk looked in a book and then said, "Dr. Kenneth Grey, 61010."

Henry said, "Thank yon very much. Is he expensive?"

"Well," the clerk answered, "he always charges his patients two pounds for their first visit to him, and one pound and 50 pennies for later visits."

Henry decided to save 50 pennies, so when he went to see the doctor, he said, "I've come again, doctor."

For a few seconds the doctor looked at his face carefully without saying anything. Then he nodded and said, "Oh, yes." He examined him and then said, "Everything's going as it should do. Just continue with the medicine I gave you last time."

美國人亨利來到倫敦度假。

有一天，他感覺不舒服，便來到旅館服務檯向服務員諮詢：“我想看病，你能幫我找一位好醫生嗎?”

服務員翻閱了一下本子，然後說：“肯尼思·格雷醫生，61010。”

亨利說：“非常感謝，他看病收費貴嗎?”

“喔，”服務員回答說，“初診患者收費2英鎊，複診收費1.5英鎊。”

亨利琢磨着能省下50便士，於是，他去看病時對醫生說：“我又來了，醫生。”

醫生一言不發地端詳着他的面容，過了一會兒點點頭說道：“哦，對。”醫生給亨利做完檢查後說：“病情得到了控制，繼續吃上次我給你的藥就可以了。”

As a professional animal trainer, I was disturbed when my own dog developed a bad habit. Every time I hung my wash out on the clothesline, she would yank it down. Drastic action was called for.

I put a white kitchen towel on the line and waited. Each time she pulled it off, I scolded her. After two weeks the towel was untouched. Then I hung out a large wash and left to do someerrands. When I came home, my clean clothes were scattered all over the yard. On the line was the white kitchen towel.

作爲一名專業的馴獸師，我對自己的狗養成的一個壞習慣感到很苦惱。每當我把洗好的衣服搭在晾衣繩上時，它總會猛地把衣物全扯下來。對此，我必須要採取嚴厲的措施。

我在繩上搭了一條白色的廚房毛巾，每當它把毛巾扯下來時，我就會訓斥它一頓。兩個星期後，它再也不碰毛巾了。於是，我把許多洗乾淨的衣服搭在晾衣繩上後，就出去辦事了。等我回到家時，洗好的衣服分散在院子的各個角落，只有那條白毛巾依然搭在繩子上。

Nat lived in a small town in England. He always stayed in England for his holidays, but then last year he thought, "I've never been outside this country. All my friends go to Spain, and they like it very much, so this year I'm going to go there too."

First he went to Madrid and stayed in a small hotel for a few days. On the first morning he went out for a walk. In England people drive on the left, but in Spain they drive on the right. Natforgot about this, and while he was crossing a busy street, a bicycle knocked him down.

Nat lay on the ground for a few seconds and then he sat up and said: "Where am I?" An old man was selling maps at the side of the street, and he at once came to Nat and said, "Map of the city, sir?"

蘭特住在英格蘭的一座小鎮上。他的假日一直都是在這裏度過的，可是去年，他想：“我從來都沒有出過國。我的朋友們都很喜歡去日本度假，今年我也準備去那裏。”

他先是去了馬德里，並在一家小旅館住了幾天。來到這裏的第一天，他一早起來去散步。在英國，人們都是靠左行駛，但是西班牙人都是靠右行駛。蘭特忘記了這點，於是在他穿過一條繁雜的街道時，不幸被一輛自行車撞倒了。

蘭特在地上躺了幾秒鐘，隨後坐起來問道：“我這是在哪兒?”這時，路邊正好有一位老人在賣地圖，於是他立即走上前去，對蘭特說：“先生，買地圖嗎?