幽默風趣英語故事三則

幽默故事，能讓你在信手翻啓間開懷一笑，得到身心的徹底放鬆、心緒的怦然萌動、情感的欣然釋放。下面本站小編爲大家帶來風趣幽默的英語故事三則，歡迎大家閱讀!

風趣幽默英語故事：電子郵件

A man left for a vacation to Jamaica.

有個人去牙買加度假，

His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day.

他的妻子正好出差，所以打算在他到之後的第二天去找他。

When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail message.

他到了賓館，想要給妻子發封郵件，

Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory.

但是記着郵箱的紙找不到了，於是他憑着記憶把信發到了一個郵箱。

Unfortunately, he missed one letter, and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife whose husband had passed away only the day before.

很不幸，他漏掉了一個字母，因此他的信發到了一個老傳教士的妻子的郵箱裏，而傳教士恰好在前一天去世了。

When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor dead.

悲痛的老婦人察看郵箱，看着顯示器屏幕她尖叫一聲，隨後就倒在地上死去了。

At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen: "Dearest Wife, Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

聽到她的聲音，家人趕忙跑進她的房間，只見這樣一句話顯示在屏幕上：“親愛的，快來吧。爲了你明天的到來，一切都準備好了。愛你的丈夫。

Your Loving Husband. P.S. Sure is hot down here."

順便說一句，這裏可真夠熱的。”

　風趣幽默英語故事：墓地驚魂

One dark night two guys were walking home after a party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery.

一個漆黑的夜晚，兩個小夥子參加完聚會，決定抄近路穿過一片墳地走回家。

When they got to about the middle of the graveyard they were startled and stopped moving. There was this terrifying noise, “TAP-TAP-TAP” coming from the shadows.

走到墳地的中間，從陰暗處傳出來恐怖的“嗒、嗒、嗒”聲音，嚇得他們再也走不動了。

Trembling with fear, they spotted an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

渾身顫抖着，他們發現有個老人正拿着榔頭和鑿子鑿一塊墓碑。

"Holy cow, Mister,” one of them said after catching his breath.

“噢，主啊，”其中一個屏住呼吸說，

“You SCARED us half to death. We thought you were a GHOST! What are you doing working here so late at night?"

“你嚇死我們了，我們還以爲你是鬼了。這麼晚了你在這幹什麼呢?”

"Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!!"

“這些傻瓜!”老人抱怨說，“他們拼錯了我的名字!”

風趣幽默英語故事：油是免費的

I stopped at a fast food restaurant recently.

有一次我走進一家快餐店，

I was fascinated by a sign which offered Fat Free French Fries.

被一個標誌牌吸引了，上面寫着“無油薯條”。

I decided to give them a try.

我打算嚐嚐，

I was dismayed when the clerk pulled a basket of fries from the fryer which were dripping with fat.

但是看到服務員從鍋裏撈出的一籃薯條沾滿了油，真是嚇了我一大跳。

He filled a bag with these fries and put them in my order.

他給我裝了一袋，賬單上顯示出價錢。

"Just a minute!" I said. 'Those aren't fat free." "Yes, they are. We only charge for the potatoes.... The fat is free!"

“等會兒，”我說，“這不是無油的?”“是的，我們只對薯條收費，油是免費的!”