保持家庭幸福的真理

無論是什麼原因，兩夫妻總是吵架總是不好的。那麼如何才能健康的經營好婚姻呢？

"A good marriage is one which allows for change and growth in the individuals and in the way they express their love" - Pearl S. Buck

Look for the good 看到對方好的一面

When you fell in love you only see the good in your partner. You were not selfish. To keep your love alive, accept him for what he is just like when you were infatuated. Love him for what he is instead of thinking only of your 't over react to his negative behavior and weaknesses. Learn to forgive and get rid of grudges. Allow your partner the freedom to be the way he is completely and unconditionally。

當你沐浴在愛中時，你只能看到對方好的一面。你一點兒也不自私。當你被愛衝昏頭腦時，你爲了維持愛會接受對方的一切。當一切歸於平靜，請要愛他原來的樣子，而不是你想要對方成爲的樣子。不要對於對方不好的行爲或者弱點有過激的反應。學會體諒和原諒，不要有怨意。給你的另一半自由去完全的做自己。

Communicate 溝通

Talk and listen but avoid nagging. Never let a day pass without discussing and communicating. Share your problems with him and tell him yours. Talk about dreams, goals and love. Don't bring your anger to the next day. Resolve it or forget about it。

溝通傾聽，不要碎碎念。不能一天不溝通交流。與對方分享自己的困擾。分享自己的夢想、目標、愛與喜好。不要把氣帶到第二天。解決你的怒氣，或者忘了它。

Let go of psychological dependency and expecting approval 不要過度依賴對方

Any relationship succeeds when there is interdependence. You must take responsibility for yourself. Avoid making your partner the source of your happiness. You are moments away from depression if you depend on your partner's words and actions to live your life。

成功的兩性關係是建立在互相依賴上的。你要對自己負責。不要讓你的另一半成爲你幸福的唯一來源。如果你一切的生活都建立在對方的話或者行爲上，那麼你就離抑鬱不遠了。

Avoid trying to be right 不要一味力求自己是對的

When you try to be right you are trying to have control. Your marriage will suffer. You will hurt yourself and your husband. A demanding relationship will not survive for long. Focus instead on what needs improvement and work on it. The best thing to do is work on you。

當你一味追求自己是對的，那麼你就是在試圖控制對方。你的婚姻會受到影響。你會讓自己以及對方受到傷害。一段過於苛刻的婚姻無法長久。更專注在你們之間需要改進的地方，試圖有所改變。最好的辦法是從自己下手，找到自己的問題在哪兒，改掉不好的地方。

Ask for what you want 告知對方你想要什麼，你的感受

Know your feelings. Be honest with what you want. Your partner cannot read your mind. Ask for what you want without using threats and him know of how you feel. Learn to say "No" to something you don't want to do or give. Obligation can cause problems in your relationship。

知道自己的感受，知道自己要什麼。對自己想要的東西誠實。你的另一半不會讀心術。告訴對方你要什麼，但不要用威脅的方式。告訴對方你的感受和想法。對於你不想要做或者給的東西學會說“不”。所謂的義務會給你們的關係造成問題。

Build trust 互相信任

Trust is an important component. Trust that he loves you and is honest. Don't snoop or spy on him. Avoid feeling doubtful and jealous. When you behave this way, your spouse will feel suffocated. And it shows that you have low self esteem。

信任是非常重要的一個因素。相信對方是真的愛你的，對方也是誠實的。不要暗中監視或者調查對方。避免質疑或者嫉妒的心理。當你一直疑神疑鬼時，你的另一半會感到窒息。而且這樣你也就自我貶值了。

Respect 學會尊重

Have self respect and your spouse will treat you right. Listen when he's talking and he will do the same. Don't embarrass him or criticize him in the presence of others and he won't do it to you. If he does, tell him that you don't like it。

有自尊，對方也會尊重你。當對方在說話時，學會傾聽。這樣但你說話時，對方也會聽。不要在其他人面前讓他丟臉或者跟他擡槓，這樣他也不會這樣。如果他這麼做了，告訴他你不喜歡這樣被對待！

Create space 要有自己的空間

Though you are married, live together and share almost everything, allow for personal space for each one at home and outside. You should have your own group of friends that you don't have to share with him and allow him to do the same。

雖然你們已經結婚了，你們住在一起，幾乎分享所有的事物。但是無論在家裏還是在外面，仍要給對方也給自己一點私人空間。你要有自己的朋友，這些朋友也許你不必全部與他分享。同樣也允許他有自己的朋友。