經典科幻文學:《基本上無害 Mostly Harmless》 第18章4

‘I think it may be something unimaginably dangerous.

“我猜那可能是種危險的要命的東西。”

‘And you sent it to me?’ protested Arthur.

“於是你就把它寄給我？”阿瑟抱怨道。

‘Safest place I could think of. I thought I could rely on you to be absolutely boring and not open it. Anyway, coming in at night I couldn’t find this village place. I was going by pretty basic information. I couldn’t find any signal of any kind. I guess you don’t have signals and stuff here.’

“我能想到的最安全的地方。我覺得你這人靠得住，你無趣到極點，肯定不會拆開看。反正，因爲是夜裏過來，我找不到你那什麼村子。我手裏的情報又不多，又搜索不到任何信號，我猜你們這兒還沒有信號什麼的。”

‘That’s what I like about it.’

“我喜歡的就是這一點。”

‘Then I did pick up a faint signal from your old copy of the Guide, so I homed in on that, thinking that would take me to you. I found I’d landed in some kind of wood. Couldn’t figure out what was going on. I get out, and then see this woman standing there. I go up to say hello, then suddenly I see that she’s got this thing!’

“然後我居然收到了你的老《指南》發出的一點點信號，所以我就往那邊飛，以爲能找到你。我發現自己降落在一片林子之類的地方，想不通到底是怎麼回事，於是我就下了飛機，然後就看見那女人站在那兒。我走過去想打個招呼，突然發現那東西在她那！”

‘What thing?’

“什麼東西？”

‘The thing I sent you! The new Guide! The bird thing! You were meant to keep it safe, you idiot, but this woman had the thing right there by her shoulder. I ran forward and she hit me with a rock.’

“我寄給你的那個東西。新《銀河系漫遊指南》！那鳥兒一樣的玩意。你本來該確保它的安全，你這傻瓜，結果卻讓那個女人把它搞到手了，就在她肩膀上。我跑過去然後她就拿塊石頭砸我。”

‘I see,’ said Arthur. ‘What did you do?’

“明白了。”阿瑟說，“你又是怎麼辦的？”

‘Well, I fell over of course. I was very badly hurt. She and the bird started to make off towards my ship. And when I say my ship, I mean an RW6.’

“唔，我當然是摔倒了。我傷的很重。她跟那隻鳥開始朝我的飛船走。還有，當我說我的飛船的時候，我指的是一艘RW6。”

‘A what?’

“一艘什麼？”

‘An RW6 for Zark’s sake. I’ve got this great relationship going now between my credit card and the Guide’s central computer. You would not believe that ship, Arthur, it’s…

“一艘RW6，看在老天的份上。現在我的信用卡跟《指南》的中央電腦關係鐵着呢。那艘船簡直讓人難以置信，阿瑟，它……”

‘So an RW6 is a spaceship, then?’

“這麼說RW6是艘飛船了？”

‘Yes! It’s – oh never mind. Look, just get some kind of grip will you, Arthur? Or at least get some kind of catalogue. At this point I was very worried. And, I think, semi-concussed. I was down on my knees and bleeding profusely, so I did the only thing I could think of, which was to beg. I said, please, for Zark’s sake don’t take my ship. And don’t leave me stranded in the middle of some primitive zarking forest with no medical help and a head injury. I could be in serious trouble and so could she.’

“對！它是——哦，算了。聽着，拜託你稍微振作些好嗎阿瑟，或者至少搞本商品目錄看看也好。總之，到那時候我已經非常擔心了。而且，我猜，稍微有點腦震盪。我跪在地上使勁流血，於是我就做了自己唯一能想到的事，就是苦苦哀求。我說，求求你，看在老天的份上別開走我的飛船。而且別留我一個人在這麼個見鬼的原始森林裏，我腦袋受了傷又得不到醫療護理。我可能會有大麻煩的，你也一樣。”

‘What did she say?’

“那她怎麼說？”