經典科幻文學:《基本上無害 Mostly Harmless》第22章8

Arthur nodded intelligently. There were times when he wished he understood what on earth Ford was talking about, and other times, like now, when he felt it was probably safer not even to try. He looked over Ford’s shoulder. ‘This isn’t going to take long, is it?’ he said.

阿瑟一臉精明地點着頭，有些時候他真的希望能夠理解福特到底在說些什麼鬼東西，另外一些時候，比如現在，他覺得壓根兒別費這腦筋其實更安全些。他從福特的肩膀後頭瞄了一眼，“不會寫太久吧？”他問。

‘Nah,’ said Ford. ‘Piece of piss. Just mention that the rolls were quite good, the beer good and cold, local wildlife nicely eccentric, the bar singer the best in the known universe, and that’s about it. Doesn’t need much. Just a validation.’

“不會，”福特道，“小菜一碟。只要提提肉卷挺不錯，啤酒不錯而且是涼的，當地的野生動植物怪異得可愛，酒吧歌手是已知宇宙裏最棒的，這就差不多了。用不着多少內容，只不過是爲了搞到報銷。”

He touched an area on the screen marked ENTER and the message vanished into the Sub-Etha.

他撫過屏幕上的“發送”兩個字，剛纔的評論立刻消失在亞以太網裏。

‘You thought the singer was pretty good then?’

“這麼說你覺得那個歌手挺不錯？”

‘Yeah,’ said Ford. The barman was returning with a piece of paper, which seemed to be trembling in his hand.

“唔。”福特說，酒保拿着張紙片回來了，他的手似乎微微有些抖。

He pushed it over to Ford with a kind of nervous, reverential twitch.

他把紙片推到福特跟前，動作裏帶着種緊張又崇敬的抽搐。

‘Funny thing,’ said the barman. ‘The system rejected it first couple times. Can’t say it surprised me.’ Beads of sweat were standing on his brow. ‘Then suddenly it’s, oh yeah, that’s OK, and the system… er, validates it. Just like that. You wanna… sign it’?’

“真有意思。”酒保說，“頭兩次系統都不肯接受，對這個我倒並沒有多吃驚。”他額頭上立着大顆大顆的汗珠，“後來它突然變了臉，‘哦是啊沒問題’之類的，系統就這麼……額，接受了。就那樣，你想……籤嗎？”

Ford scanned the form quickly. He sucked his teeth. ‘This is going to hurt InfiniDim a lot,’ he said, with an appearance of concern. ‘Oh well,’ he added softly, ‘screw ‘em.’

福特快速瀏覽了一邊內容，他舔舔牙，“無限帥可要倒大黴了。”他一臉關切地說，“哦好吧。”他又柔聲補充道，“活該。”

He signed with a flourish and handed it back to the barman.

他簽了個花裏胡哨的名字，把紙片交回給酒保。

‘More money,’ he said, ‘than the Colonel made for him in an entire career of doing crap movies and casino gigs. Just for doing what he does best. Standing up and singing in a bar. And he negotiated it himself. I think this is a good moment for him. Tell him I said thanks and buy him a drink.’ He tossed a few coins on the bar. The barman pushed them away.

“那個人，演了一輩子爛片，外加賭場裏走秀，”他說，“也沒今天一天掙得多。還只需要幹他最拿手的活：站在酒吧裏唱唱歌。連談判都自己搞定了。我覺得這一刻他感覺肯定不錯。幫我謝謝他，再請他喝一杯。”他往吧檯上扔了幾枚硬幣。酒保把它們推開。

‘I don’t think that’s necessary,’ he said, slightly hoarsely.

“沒這必要。”他的聲音稍微有些嘶啞。

‘ ’Tis to me,’ said Ford. ‘OK, we are outa here.’

“對我有必要。”福特說，“好吧，我們這就走。”