經典科幻文學:《銀河系漫遊指南》第7章 Part 2

"Oh frettled gruntbuggly ..." he began. Spasms wracked Ford's body — this was worse than ever he'd been prepared for.
"... thy micturations are to me | As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee."
"Aaaaaaarggggghhhhhh!" went Ford Prefect, wrenching his head back as lumps of pain thumped through it. He could dimly see beside him Arthur lolling and rolling in his seat. He clenched his teeth.
"Groop I implore thee," continued the merciless Vogon, "my foonting turlingdromes."
His voice was rising to a horrible pitch of impassioned stridency. "And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,| Or I will rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon, see if I don't!"
"Nnnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyuuuuuuurrrrrrrggggggghhhhh!" cried Ford Prefect and threw one final spasm as the electronic enhancement of the last line caught him full blast across the temples. He went limp.
Arthur lolled.
"Now Earthlings ..." whirred the Vogon (he didn't know that Ford Prefect was in fact from a small planet in the vicinity of Betelgeuse, and wouldn't have cared if he had) "I present you with a simple choice! Either die in the vacuum of space, or ..." he paused for melodramatic effect, "tell me how good you thought my poem was!"
He threw himself backwards into a huge leathery bat-shaped seat and watched them. He did the smile again.

“哦，流着口水你貼上我的臉……”他開始了。一陣痙攣襲擊了福特的身體——這詩比他已經做好思想準備的還要噁心。
“……你對着我撒尿——就像一隻病懨懨蜜蜂發狂似的叫。”
“啊、啊、啊！……”福特·普里弗克特痛苦地呻吟着，拼命向後扭着脖子。他模模糊糊看到身旁的阿瑟慢慢在座位上蜷成了一團。他咬緊了牙關。
“我哀求你，”毫無憐憫之心的沃貢人繼續念道，“我長着鼻毛的愛人。”
他的音調提高到了幾乎快刺穿耳膜的程度，“用黏稠的液體沐浴我，或者我將會撕裂你，你看我會不會！”
“不、不、不！……”福特·普里弗克特慘叫起來，在全詩的最後一行經過加強通過他的太陽穴時，他爆發了最後一次痙攣，然後整個人癱軟下去。
阿瑟繼續蜷縮着。
“現在，地球小子……”沃貢人呼哧呼哧地說（他還不知道福特·普里弗克特實際上來自參宿四附近的一顆小行星，不過就算知道了他也絲毫不會在意），“我給你們提供一個簡單的選擇機會！或者死在外太空的真空中，或者……”他頓了一下，“告訴我你們多麼喜歡我的詩！”
說完，他向後倒進一張巨大的皮質座椅裏，望着他們。他又擠出了一個笑容。