經典科幻文學:《銀河系漫遊指南》第5章 Part 7

Ford pressed a large red button at the bottom of the screen and words began to undulate across it. At the same time, the book began to speak the entry as well in a still quiet measured voice.
This is what the book said."Vogon Constructor Fleets. Here is what to do if you want to get a lift from a Vogon: forget it. They are one of the most unpleasant races in the Galaxy — not actually evil, but bad tempered, bureaucratic, officious and callous. They wouldn't even lift a finger to save their own grandmothers from the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal without orders signed in triplicate, sent in, sent back, queried, lost, found, subjected to public inquiry, lost again, and finally buried in soft peat and recycled as firelighters.
"The best way to get a drink out of a Vogon is to stick your finger down his throat, and the best way to irritate him is to feed his grandmother to the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal.
"On no account allow a Vogon to read poetry at you."
Arthur blinked at it.
"What a strange book. How did we get a lift then?"
"That's the point, it's out of date now," said Ford, sliding the book back into its cover. "I'm doing the field research for the New Revised Edition, and one of the things I'll have to include is a bit about how the Vogons now employ Dentrassi cooks which gives us a rather useful little loophole."
A pained expression crossed Arthur's face. "But who are the Dentrassi?" he said.

福特按下屏幕下方的一個紅色大按鈕，一個個句子開始在屏幕上閃過。同時，電子書開始以一種冷靜、節制的聲音朗讀這些句子。
內容是這樣的：“沃貢建築施工艦隊，如果你希望擺脫一個沃貢人，惟一的辦法就是：忘記這事。他們是銀河系中最令人不愉快的種族之一——實質上並不邪惡，但是脾氣不好，官僚氣嚴重，好管閒事並且冷酷無情。如果沒有正式簽署的一式三份的命令，他們甚至不會伸出哪怕是一根手指從貪婪的特拉爾怪獸口中救出自己的祖母。
“讓一個沃貢人把酒吐出來的最好辦法就是用你的手指戳進他的喉嚨，而激怒他的最好辦法則是把他的祖母拿去喂貪婪的特拉爾怪獸。
“絕對不能讓一個沃貢人對着你念詩，”
阿瑟對着書一個勁兒眨眼。
“這可真是一本奇怪的書。那麼，我們怎麼樣擺脫呢？”
“這正是問題的關鍵所在，上面說的現在已經過時了。”福特說着把書又塞進封面，“我正在爲新的修訂版本進行實地調查研究，我必須要做的事情之一就足總結一下沃貢人目前是如何僱用丹特拉斯人作爲廚師的，這能夠使我們發現一個相當有用的小漏洞。”
又有一絲痛苦的表情閃過阿瑟的臉。“可是，丹特拉斯人又是什麼人呢？”他問道。