經典趣味幽默笑話四則
在日常繁忙的生活，也不要忘記了放鬆自己。下面本站小編爲大家帶來趣味幽默笑話四則，希望大家喜歡!
趣味幽默笑話：情書
Jenny Cordon was a very kind and beautiful woman and before she married, many men were in love with her. Many of them wrote to her, telling her how wonderful she was, how much they loved her and wanted to marry her.
珍尼·戈登是個溫柔優雅的女人，在她結婚以前有許多男人追求過她。他們給她寫情書，誇讚她的美貌，表述自己是多麼的愛她並且期望着她能夠嫁給他
Jenny kept all these letters. She tied them up with a red ribbon and put them away in an old box. She never looked at them as she was happily married，however, they were a part of her life and she did not want to throw them away.
珍尼收藏着所有的情書。她用了一條紅色的絲帶把那些信件繫好，放在了一箇舊盒子裏面。自從她有了完美的婚姻以後她就再也沒有打開過那些信件。然而，那畢竟是她生命中所渡過的一段美妙的時光，所以她並不打算把那些信件給扔掉。
Jenny had a daughter, Sue. Sue was six.
珍尼有一個女兒叫蘇，蘇今年六歲了。
One day, Jenny had to leave Sue alone for half an hour.
一天，珍尼有事，要把蘇獨自留在家中半個小時。
"Now be a good girl,” she said. “play quietly. If you need anything, go to the lady next door.”
“要做個乖孩子啊!”她說:“好好玩吧，如果需要什麼就去找鄰家的阿姨。”
When she returned home, she asked Sue，“Have you been a good girl?"
當她辦完事情回到家中，她問蘇:“有沒有做個乖孩子啊?”
"Oh , yes，Mommy ,”Sue said.
“當然了，媽媽。”蘇答道。
"What did you do while I was out?" Jenny asked her.
“我不在家的時候你都幹什麼了?”珍尼問她。
"I played mailman” Sue told her.
“我假扮郵遞員做遊戲。”蘇說。
"How could you play mailman, darling?" Jenny asked. "You didn't have any letters.”
“親愛的，你怎麼扮郵遞員?”珍追問到:“你又沒有信!”
"Oh, yes I did, Mommy，”Sue said: "I found some in an old box upstairs. They were tied up with a red ribbon. I put one in every mailbox in the street. Wasn't I a good girl?"
“噢，我有，媽媽。”蘇說:“我在樓上的舊盒子裏面找到了好多信，信上還用紅色的絲帶繫着呢!我把這些信分別放在街上每家的郵箱裏了，你說我是不是個乖孩子?”
趣味幽默笑話：過分的恭維
When I was 28，I was teaching English to high school freshmen in a schools where occasionally the faculty and staff were allowed to dress down.
28歲那年，我在一所高中教一年級學生英語。這所學校允許教職員工有時不必穿得那麼正式。
One of those days, I donned a sweatshirt and slacks. A student came in and his eyes widened.
一天，我穿了一件運動衫和一條休閒褲。一個學生進來看見後，看着我瞪大了眼睛。
"Wow!” He exclaimed. "You should wear clothes like that everyday. You look twenty, maybe even thirty years younger”
“哇哦!”他大呼小叫地說:“你該天天都這麼穿。你看上去足足年輕了20歲，甚至30歲呢!”
趣味幽默笑話：行人和斧子
Two men were traveling along the same road. When one of them, picking up a hatchet, cried:
有兩個人在同一條路上走，其中一個撿到了一把斧子，於是叫了起來:
"See what I have found!”
“瞧我發現的東西!”
"Do not say I,” said the other, "but we have found.”
“不要說‘我”，另一個人說，“該說‘我們’發現的。”
After a while up came the man who lost it, and accused he was a theft.
過了一會兒，那個丟了斧子的人來了，指責拿着斧子的人偷了他的斧子。
"Alas,” said he to his companion, "we are undone!”
“哎呀，”他對他的夥伴說，“這回我們完了!”
“Do not say we,” replied the other, "but, I am undone; for he that will not allow his friend to share the prize must not expect him to share the danger.”
“不要說‘我們’，”另一個人回答說，“該說‘我’完了。一個人不能與朋友分享所得，就不該指望與別人分擔風險。”
趣味幽默笑話：人盡其才
little boy bustled into a grocery one day with a memorandum in his hand.
一天，一個小男孩匆匆忙忙地走進了一家雜貨店，手裏拿着一張清單。
"Hello, Mr. Smith,” He said. “I want thirteen pounds of coffee at 32 cents.”
“史密斯先生，你好。”他說道:“三毛二分錢一磅的咖啡，請給我十三磅。”
"Very good,” said the grocer, and he noted down the sale.
“好的。”雜貨店老闆馬上把這筆生意記了下來。
"Anything e1se, Charlie?"
“還要別的什麼不，查理?”
"Yes. Twenty一seven pounds of sugar at 9 cents.”
“要的。再要二十七磅糖，九分錢一磅的。”
"The loaf, eh? And what else?"
“麪包要不要?還要什麼?”
"Seven and a half pounds of bacon at 20 cents.”
“七磅半鹹肉，二毛錢一磅的。”
"That will be a good brand. Go on.”
這肉是名牌呢。還有嗎?”
"Five pounds of tea at 90 cents; eleven and a half quarts of molasses at 8 cents a pint; two eight一pound hams at 21 cents, and five dozen jars of pickled walnuts at 24 cents a jar.”
“九毛錢一磅的茶葉，給我五磅;八分錢一品脫的糖漿要十一夸脫半;二毛一分錢的八磅大火腿要兩隻，二毛四分錢一罐的醃核桃要五打。”
The grocer made out the bill.
雜貨店老闆把帳單算了出來。
"It’s a big order,” he said. "Did your mother tell you to pay for it?"
“你買了很多東西，”他說:“你媽媽叫你現在把錢付清嗎?”
"My mother,” said the boy, as he pocketed the neat and accurate bill, "has nothing to do with this business. It is my arithmetic lesson and I had to get it done somehow.”
小男孩一面把那清楚準確的賬單放進口袋一面說:“這和我媽沒關係，這是我自己的算術作業，我總得想辦法把它做出來!”
