經典科幻文學:《銀河系漫遊指南》第5章 Part 3

One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about human beings was their habit of continually stating and repeating the obvious, as in It's a nice day, or You're very tall, or Oh dear you seem to have fallen down a thirty-foot well, are you alright? At first Ford had formed a theory to account for this strange behaviour. If human beings don't keep exercising their lips, he thought, their Mouths probably seize up. After a few months' consideration and observation he abandoned this theory in favour of a new one. If they don't keep on exercising their lips, he thought, their brains start working. After a while he abandoned this one as well as being obstructively cynical and decided he quite liked human beings after all, but he always remained desperately worried about the terrible number of things they didn't know about.
"Yes," he agreed with Arthur, "no light." He helped Arthur to some peanuts. "How do you feel?" he asked.
"If I asked you where the hell we were," said Arthur weakly, "would I regret it?"
Ford stood up. "We're safe," he said.
"Oh good," said Arthur.
"We're in a small galley cabin," said Ford, "in one of the spaceships of the Vogon Constructor Fleet."
"Ah," said Arthur, "this is obviously some strange usage of the word safe that I wasn't previously aware of."
Ford struck another match to help him search for a light switch. Monstrous shadows leaped and loomed again. Arthur struggled to his feet and hugged himself apprehensively. Hideous alien shapes seemed to throng about him, the air was thick with musty smells which sidled into his lungs without identifying themselves, and a low irritating hum kept his brain from focusing.
"How did we get here?" he asked, shivering slightly.
"We hitched a lift," said Ford.

人類有一個習慣是福特·普里弗克特始終感到難以理解的，那就是不斷重複一個非常非常明顯的事實，比如說“今天天氣不錯”，或者“你真高啊”，或者“噢，親愛的，你看上去就像掉進了30英尺深的井裏，一切都還好吧”……起初，福特本以爲找到了一種理論來解釋這種奇怪的行爲：如果人類不堅持鍛鍊嘴脣的話，他想，他們的嘴也許會失靈。不過，在經過幾個月的思考和觀察之後，他放棄了這種理論，而轉向了新的一種：如果他們不堅持鍛鍊嘴脣的話，他想，他們的大腦就會開始工作。一段時間後，他又放棄了這種理論。他想通了，不管怎樣自己還是很喜歡人類的。但同時，人類毫不知曉的事情太多了，他一直爲此感到近乎絕望的擔憂。
“是的，”他附和阿瑟道，“沒有光。”他幫助阿瑟吃了一些花生。“你感覺怎麼樣？”他問。
“如果我問你我們這是在什麼鬼地方，”阿瑟虛弱地說，“我會後悔嗎？”
福特站起身來。“我們現在很安全。”他說。
“喔，那真是太好了。”阿瑟說。
“我們是在一間小廚房裏，”福特說，“在沃貢建築施工艦隊的一艘飛船上。”
“哦，”阿瑟說，“顯然這是‘安全’這個詞兒的一種奇怪的新用法，我以前可沒有意識到。”
福特再次劃燃了一根火柴，以便找到燈的開關。巨大而怪異的陰影又開始隱約晃動起來。阿瑟在一旁擔憂地抱着胳膊。可怕的陰影看起來像要撲向他，空氣中有一股濃重的黴味，全都不分青紅皁白地鑽進他的肺裏，低沉而惱人的嗡嗡聲使他完全集中不起精神。
“我們怎麼會到這兒來的？”他問，微微地顫抖着。
“我們搭了一部電梯。”福特回答說。